Why Do the Conservatives Need the Big Government So Much?

Have you noticed how the Conservatives (the very people who keep insisting that they are against granting the government too much power over our lives) are precisely the ones who keep lobbying for a greater governmental intrusion into every aspect of our existence? Why am I even asking? Of course, you have.

There must be some curious psychological defect that makes certain people believe that the economy is the only area of their lives where they can make their own choices. In every single other area of their lives, the Conservatives remind me of 4-year-olds who start bawling, “Mommy, Mommy Johnny showed me his willie!”  whenever the world begins to look threatening and complex. The degree to which a regular Conservative needs to be protected from life by the big, all-powerfull government is really scary.

Among many recent examples of the Conservative desire to get the government to regulate every aspect of the citizens’ existence is this hilarious bill they are trying to promote in Arizona. Well, where else?

Arizona House Bill 2549 passed both legislative houses last Thursday and is now awaiting approval from Arizona’s governor Brewer. The statute states that:

“It is unlawful for any person, with intent to terrify, intimidate, threaten, harass, annoy or offend, to use a ANY ELECTRONIC OR DIGITAL DEVICE and use any obscene, lewd or profane language or suggest any lewd or lascivious act, or threaten to inflict physical harm to the person or property of any person.”

The bill was obviously proposed by people who are so completely helpless without the government defending and protecting them at every step of the way, that they even need it to regulate their online interactions.

You’ve got to be all kinds of a wimpy, pathetic little thing to need the government to protect you from people making annoying comments and using “bad words” online. If somebody says something annoying to you on the Internet, surely, you can  just suck it up, grab those long-suffering bootstraps and do whatever it is you always do with them. If other people can get over themselves and live without health insurance, then why can’t you be a grown-up and deal with a couple of “lewd and lascivious” terms on the Internet? Of course, if being among adults is so traumatic for you, then maybe you can avoid going online altogether.

12 thoughts on “Why Do the Conservatives Need the Big Government So Much?

  1. Change “conservative” to “Republican” and that would be more true. Lots of conservatives whose blogs I’ve been reading think that and similar bills are an abomination. (To be fair, so do plenty of Republicans.) And I do believe that this and similar proposed bills have their Democrat supporters. Especially if they are proposed under the rubrics of “anti-bullying” or “anti-Hate Speech.” I was told point-blank by a liberal in a comment section that we need more laws to prevent “hate speech” (but that to say that was condoning censorship was a “straw man” because when liberals want to put people in jail for saying things that make them uncomfortable that’s good).

    And so on. It’s not just on one political side. It’s just what the sides are against. Conservatives who want to censor any speech that has to do with sex. Liberals want to censor any speech that has to do with race. (And sex as well, though from the other side, but it’s getting to the point where I’m sure I’m going to see someone call a homophobe a “racist.”) Both groups are not too fond of political disagreement and look for any opportunity to bring such discussions to a halt — usually just when they get interesting. And it’s all being done in the name of “the Children” and being “nice.” The result is a mass of people with fake smiles on their faces who are seething with hostility inside. Include me out.

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    1. “And I do believe that this and similar proposed bills have their Democrat supporters”

      – Democrats from Arizona are ultra-conservatives, in my view. 🙂

      ” I was told point-blank by a liberal in a comment section that we need more laws to prevent “hate speech” (but that to say that was condoning censorship was a “straw man” because when liberals want to put people in jail for saying things that make them uncomfortable that’s good).”

      – At least, the Liberals never pretended that they are against tighter governmental controls on everything. I disagree with their position but at least they are consistent. here, what I want to explore is why the Conservatives are against governmental intrusion in just one single area of their lives and so pro that very intrusion in other areas.

      “Both groups are not too fond of political disagreement and look for any opportunity to bring such discussions to a halt — usually just when they get interesting. And it’s all being done in the name of “the Children” and being “nice.” The result is a mass of people with fake smiles on their faces who are seething with hostility inside”

      – Very true.

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      1. – At least, the Liberals never pretended that they are against tighter governmental controls on everything. I disagree with their position but at least they are consistent. here, what I want to explore is why the Conservatives are against governmental intrusion in just one single area of their lives and so pro that very intrusion in other areas.

        Huh?? This liberal is a strong ACLU supporter, as are most liberals I know. But a lot of Xtians are not; I know some who give money to anti-ACLU groups.

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      2. I agree with David. There are definitely liberals out there who would support stronger government intervention when it comes to safeguarding their values, but I don’t think they’re the majority, or even a large minority. There are people of every political affiliation who would compromise part of their platform when it comes to particular issues that are very dear to them. Unfortunately, the parties that are the least likely to do this–the Libertarian Party or the Green Party, for instance–are never very likely to win major elections…

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  2. I don’t actually think many conservatives have thought through this whole “less government” thing. They’re like most Americans — they want to have their cake and eat it too: they want to keep more of their money and pay less taxes, but don’t you touch their Medicare; they want those gays and single mothers to be made to “stop doing all that sex stuff” but they also want to talk about Free Speech™ and how we are the freest free country that ever freed its slaves, and so on. And also you better not censor tv (For the Children™!) because god forbid they miss the latest salacious gossip on the latest celebrity to forget to wear her underpants who backed out of a limo while drunk. It’s just a different brand of hypocrisy.

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    1. Argh that was supposed to be a reply. I almost forgot to mention: they’re against abortion but they’re also against helping poor women get birth control. For some reason poor women are supposed to live like nuns while rich women who can afford to take the pill and have sex whenever they want. Why conservatives, who talk a big game on how they’re the ones who really understand Human Nature, think this will work is beyond me.

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  3. This is a stupid bill.

    However, the left isn’t blameless either when it comes to “cyberbullying.”

    A Rutgers University student who uploaded his roommate’s sexual escapades online could face 10 years in prison for allegedly committing a “hate crime.” (See http://www.csmonitor.com/USA/Justice/2012/0316/Dharun-Ravi-guilty-of-anti-gay-hate-crime-in-Rutgers-spycam-case)

    Why the left thinks he deserves more prison time than a rapist is beyond me.

    What he did was a gross violation of privacy and hateful, but a 10-year prison sentence is beyond the pale of reason.

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  4. the twisted spinster makes very good points I think. However, I disagree that conservaitves want to let people be free in one way while intruding in their lives in every other way. It’s more the opposite: conservatives pretty much want people to be able to do pretty much whatever they want, except when it comes to sex. Anything related to that, and they want to control everything (ban abortions, gays are evil, etc…). Not all conservatives are like this, but quite a few.

    The ones to me who seem to want to control every aspect of people’s lives with one exception, are the leftists. They want to control what we can say, eat, drink, drive, whether you can own guns, how much money you can make, what materials you have to use in constructing your home, etc…basically everything the conservatives want people to be free on. However, on the issues the conservatives oftentimes want to control, they are for people being free (abortions, gay marriage, etc…).

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  5. Well, with a bit of luck, this will put an end to obnoxious ring tones. It’s not only bad. On the other side however, I don’t want to life in a place were being annoying is illegal. That would totally ruin my gig.

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