How to Avoid a Midlife Crisis

A consistently brilliant reader Musteryou uses the example of whiny woman-haters to explain how one can avoid a mid-life crisis:

I have a theory that one only really experiences a midlife crisis if one has not been living authentically. For instance, if you have been living according to an ideology that has promised obeying its rules will ultimately bear fruit, you might suddenly feel let down in mid-life when this doesn’t happen. That’s it not the fault of feminism, though, which (as Farrell’s quote also points out) allows women to actually make an authentic identity for themselves. The unmaking of men comes about because they have bought into all sorts of nonsense in the first place. “Stop allowing your life to be determined from the outside and instead develop an inner life of your own,” should be the advice given to whining males. Above all, stop trying to steal feminism’s inner light. If it’s not your own light, you’re just going to make everything so much worse for yourselves. Growing up means learning how to establish an identity on one’s own terms. Oprah cannot do it for you. Smashing feminism can’t do it for you. Sometimes it takes baby steps.

I have the same theory of a mid-life crisis. If you take care to figure out what it is YOU want your life to be like, you will experience no need for a crisis once middle age approaches. A mid-life crisis is a problem of those who dedicated their lives to living according to the pattern suggested to them by others. A consciously constructed existence that answers only to an internal mandate will not enter into a crisis.

Sunday Link Encyclopedia and Self-Promotion

If you really do want to go to college, work for 6-7 years, and save like mad. If you get a decent, hard cert and start a “real” IT job at 21, you should be able to save something like $70,000 by the time you are 26. Then go to college all you like.” The only problem with this suggestion is that employers are increasingly reluctant to hire even receptionists with nothing but a high school diploma. I also thought that was unfair until I had to deal with a completely dense and uneducated receptionist last week.

It turns out I’m not the only person who dresses up to work at home.

A history of arcades and a history of blaming criminal behavior on games. A really great article, folks.

An example of a really horrible, annoyingly weepy teaching statement. Teaching statements are usually a huge waste of time, so my personal advice is: be as concise and functional as you can. At our department, we just skim them looking for the word “communicative.” If the word is there, the applicant advances to the next stage. If not, the applicant is kicked out of the context.

Is there a better way to let the world know you suffer from a severe erectile dysfunction than this?

There are atheists, and then there are brainless atheists. I find them as idiotic as religious fanatics because they have the same tendency to screech stupidly in a fit of a narcissistic rage.

All really brilliant people (like me and this blogger, for instance) hated school and loved college. Although we experienced them in different countries. I’m sure there is an explanation.

The problematic nature of the “pregnancy is not a disease” mantra. I agree with this blogger and I have to add that “pregnancy is the most natural thing in the world” bugs me to no end. Humanity abandoned all pretense at doing what nature intended with our bodies such a long time ago that insisting there is anything natural left is highly stupid. In terms of pregnancy, nature intended that a woman would start getting pregnant every year from the time of the menarchy and die in childbirth by the age of 25 when she would already be a total physical wreck. I don’t think you know anybody who lives this way, do you? It’s also curious how nobody is proposing to treat our teeth as nature intended (i.e. let them rot and fall out by adulthood.)

If wedding preparation is the time an adult woman is allowed to indulge, then perhaps her engagement marks the beginning of a phase of socially acceptable material-driven self-centeredness.” Is that the reason so many women obsess over the stupid wedding ceremony? Is it because they don’t feel they are entitled to be the center of the universe throughout their entire lives? Poor idiots.

And speaking of marriage-then-babies: I have yet to come across a married couple where the baby has only the woman’s name.” I’m certainly not a baby but I used to be one. My sister, too. We have our mother’s name, and our parents have been married for 37 years. And I can bet you anything that you do not have a better or a closer relationship with your father than I do with mine.

Toilet paper and pathos.

I made his salad yesterday and it was very good. (Radishes, cucumbers, apples).

A religious fanatic was screeching about Christianity while sexually abusing her own daughter. Why am I not surprised?

A good post on women’s bodies as public property. I would like to add to the blogger’s list 1) the endless advice that pregnant women get from strangers as if it were other people’s duty and right to manage the pregnant women’s bodies, and 2) people always trying to touch pregnant women’s bellies. Ask any pregnant woman and she will tell you how weird it was to feel that being pregnant somehow demolished the personal boundaries and put her body into public circulation and use.

Don’t let university libraries die because if you do, this will happen: “At my university we have not bought books for about fifteen years and we do not have access to very many journals. They have fired the bibliographic instruction librarian, too. People are taught not to look at the MLA or other very comprehensive bibliographies because we do not have most of what is in them.” This is just horrifying.

University of Toronto seems to believe that freedom of speech consists in inviting insane people to blab incoherently on campus.

Talented people can make even a post on pubic lice fascinating.