When my sister and I were visiting the Monastery of the Barefoot Nuns in Madrid, we had a shared mystic experience involving a painting of Princesses Catalina Micaela and Clara Eugenia.

Here are the princesses:

 

If I have a daughter, I will call her Klara Eugenia. And if I have a son, N. will choose a name. Also, if I have a daughter, I will probably have to become Catholic (because of the mystic experience). So I hope Catholics get a semi-decent Pope this time around.

From a student’s reading response:

It took me a while to realize that these characters are mother and daughter. The mother constantly humiliates her daughter, criticizes her, and makes her feel horrible about herself. This is just not how mothers act.

I think this student should let everybody know the name of the planet she comes from.

From a student’s essay:

The protagonist of the novel is addicted to her abusive relationship with her husband. This is like an addiction to coffee, which is a dangerous drug that can cause untold damage to an addict’s health.

The student is probably from some sect, right?

There is another curious breakdown in the way people react to the news of a pregnancy.

Group I.

With a beatific expression on their faces:

“Oh, you are SO going to love this! This will be such an amazing experience for you. The first time your baby smiles or recognizes you. . . that is simply priceless. And then you can observe her discovering the world. Like the first time she sees a tree or a kitten and looks so happy. . . And you will be discovering the world together with her. Of course, life is in no way meaningless without a child but with a child there are so many new and great experiences.”

Group II.

With a sadistic gleam in their eyes:

“Ah! Now you are going to see! Forget all about publishing or reading books. You won’t get to read a book in years! Or traveling! No more traveling for you, ha ha! And all of these expensive imported olive oils you keep buying. Pshaw! It will be just the Dollar Store for you from now on. And forget about having time to cook or money to go to good restaurants. Get used to take-out pizza and Ronald McDonald. Ha ha ha!”

This is obviously a canard but it’s still funny. See this map that supposedly shows the top 10 most commonly searched terms on porn sites around the world over a 6 month period.

The reason I think it’s a fake is because no matter which country or continent you press, the search terms all come up in English and demonstrate a lack of inventiveness that makes me think a single person created them all. Just look at the search terms for Ukraine and you’ll see I’m right. Also, the high incidence of the term “milf” in the countries of the Mediterranean is kind of suspect.

I’ve seen this map referenced on a variety of sites as a reliable source of information. This just goes to show how many people are incapable of envisioning cultural differences.

Men and women react in different ways to the news of a pregnancy.

Clarissa: I’m pregnant.

A male friend, colleague, acquaintance: Oh, that’s amazing! Congratulations!

————————
Clarissa: I’m pregnant.

A female friend, colleague, acquaintance: Is this something you wanted?

Clarissa: Yes, this was planned.

A female friend, etc.: Oh, that’s amazing! Congratulations!