The most difficult thing is doing stuff for “the first time since everything happened”, which is how I put it to myself. Today I will go to campus for the first time since. I know from experience that it’s doable. Everything is doable. But oh, it’s hard.
It has to be done because I will go back to work on November 4 and I need to get used to being back on campus before then. It will not do to be an emotional wreck as I walk into the classroom. Teaching is exercising control, and how can one exercise control over others when not being in control of oneself?