Our Problematic Sister

Our sister university is dying. This was clear a while ago from the dejected, hopeless demeanors of the faculty members who were extremely unexcited to work for their school.

We are in a bizarre situation because the sister school gets most of the finding in our university system yet produces a lot less. It constantly has to borrow money from us because, even though we get less funding, we manage our resources better and have a surplus. Our enrollments are growing. The sister’s are plummeting. We are producing tons of exciting research. They get tons more free time and money for research yet don’t produce like we do.

Just to give a single example, the sister school renamed its Foreign Languages and Literature department to “Languages, Cultures, and International Trade.” I’m sure you can measure the degree of utter desperation that produced this move.

So it’s all just like in a typical dysfunctional family.

Finally, the Board of Trustees recognized that robbing a thriving school to feed a dying one is dumb and decided to reallocate the funds we get from the state in a way that will reflect the real state of affairs. Of course, the Republican lawmakers in the state legislature immediately interfered. They clearly prefer that the entire university system that our two schools constitute should die.

I know there are people from the sister university reading this and I want them to know that I’m greatly saddened by the agony of what used to be a great school. I don’t believe, however, in dragging out agonies. Once life and joy have seeped out of a place, there’s no amount of money that can bring it back.

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