Real News

This is the really important news of the moment. Trump is battling Saudis and Russians who want to raise oil prices. He has two chips in his hand: fracking and Khashoggi.

Basically, it’s all about whether your personal budget will suffer so that Putin’s corrupt regime can survive and invade more countries. (Everybody here understands that even if you don’t drive, you lose money when global oil prices go up, right?)

We all saw Putin making googly eyes at the Saudi prince the other day, right? And we all understand that this is about oil, don’t we? I’ve been a little MIA because of the end of semester, so I don’t know if it was covered. Putin is trying to get the Saudis to raise oil prices to $100 per barrel. Google it and you’ll see that it’s not just me making it up. $100 per barrel is Putin’s sweet spot. It’s the price that lets him start invading again.

Now. Oil prices are going up no matter what because that’s what the Saudis decided. (And that’s precisely why it’s the worst idea on the planet to annoy the Saudis. Do you want the prices of consumer goods and food to shoot up? No? Then shut up and smile at the Saudis. That’s global economy for you.)

The only question is to which extent Russia will be allowed to benefit from the oil price hike. Saudis are trying to massage the Russians into accepting a cut in production, which will raise the global prices but won’t let Russia make as much money from the hike. Russians are resisting. Trump is screaming that if the oil prices go up, that will be bad for the global economy and might cause another global recession. (You’ve heard the word recession being floated around this past week, right? This is why.)

The Saudis keep the whole world dangling on a string because they regularly decide to mess with the oil prices. The only thing that gives the US a voice in this debate at all is fracking. Without fracking, we’d sit silently on the sidelines and wait for Saudis and Russians to decide together what our family’s budget will look like next month.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, maybe one day alternative energy will, blah blah. Are you going grocery shopping at all before alternative energy makes oil irrelevant? Planning to buy any clothes? Electronics? Books? Travel at all? Then this is extremely relevant to your life.

Sorry for a long post but I often encounter such depths of ignorance on the subject that it scares me. And it’s an enormous failing of our dumbass fourth estate that all they do is cluck like stupid hens over idiotic things and fail to cover really important issues.

End of Semester

My recipe for preserving my sanity during the last week of classes is to sleep until 10. Highly recommended.

I had my last day of class yesterday. Today I will be snoozing in front of the fireplace all day because I need to recover. This was one of the best semesters I’ve had but I still need to rest.