Businesses are understandably worried about survival these days. They address this anxiety by filling customers’ inboxes with deeply idiotic emails.
“Date Night In?” asks a local clothing store in the subject line.
No, you smug bastard, actually we are going to a popular restaurant and then to an art exhibit while our kid is at a sleepover with a bunch of friends. Of course, it’s date night in with our kid jumping on our heads non-stop. Got any more questions?
Rule #1 of crisis correspondence:
If you want people to click, don’t be a clueless dick.