Happy to Be Religious

I’m very glad I’m now religious because otherwise I wouldn’t know how to approach the local private schools. They are all religious. The only exception is the Montessori but it’s kind of far, and I have a kid who’s not used to being in the car for long stretches of time.

I’m kind of almost decided on the Lutheran school. I’m going to visit the school next week to see it in person. Friends with small children are assuring me that ages 5 to 8 will be taught in person “for sure for sure” starting in January but I don’t trust them anymore. Plus, the people who have spent months “teaching” five-year-olds online are either terrible human beings or complete idiots, so why should I want them?

I’m also deeply preoccupied with the nature of instruction in public schools. I have a small child, and I don’t want her to be exposed to weird gender ideology or anybody’s racial hangups. Her best friend is from Africa. I don’t want them to start avoiding each other because they were taught some insane garbage at school. Also, I’m too old to feel a constant desire to go apeshit on social-justicey teachers and have to repress it.

A friend’s 8-year-old is in the local public school, and the mother’s formerly brilliant career is pretty much ruined. They even hired a person to sit next to the poor kid and help her with her Zoom classes but it doesn’t work. The child is extremely bored and restless and constantly interrupts the mother. The dad isn’t helping because they have two little ones, and the dad is with them all day. The whole family is at the end of their rope and having mental health issues. These are wealthy people who could afford private schooling but they believe in the public school system. And this is their reward.

But hey, it’s all good. Imagine how much you’ll learn about the private religious school system on this blog if Klara gets enrolled. That’s a completely new and unexplored topic for us.

6 thoughts on “Happy to Be Religious”

  1. I attended a private religious school from grade 2-8 and it had an overall positive impact on my life. I went to public school in 9-12 and was shell-shocked by the blatantly sexual behavior of my classmates. My sixth grade son has classmates addicted to porn and completely schizoid. I wish I could afford private school for him.


  2. My misguided high-school-teacher-daughter-of-a-Presbyterian-minister mother thought that I should be in kindergarten when I was five years old (no legal requirement back in 1950), and sent me to the only Catholic church in town because it was the only kindergarten within walking distance of our home.

    The nuns in charge were sadistic Nazis who got out of Europe just in time to escape the Nuremberg Trials, and the most enjoyable day of my early childhood was watching the school burn to the ground the day it caught on fire.


    1. “nuns in charge were sadistic Nazis who got out of Europe just in time to escape the Nuremberg Trials”

      Clarissa went to Soviet schools…. I doubt if anything the nuns could do would make much of an impression…

      “most enjoyable day of my early childhood was watching the school burn to the ground the day it caught on fire”

      a…. certain…. question….. is now….. hanging in the air…


      1. “a…. certain…. question….. is now….. hanging in the air…”

        No, I didn’t start the fire. In my childish innocence, I was sure that God had started it to give the surviving nuns a foretaste of how they were going to spend eternity.

        I no longer believe in Hell, so have to conclude that there is no ultimate justice, and that they all escaped their well-deserved eternal punishment.


  3. I spent nearly ten of my grade-school years at two different little Protestant parochial schools. For four of those years we cleaned the building after hours in exchange for tuition. It wasn’t always idyllic (there were moments), but it was definitely worth it. Spent just enough time in public schools to know the difference, and it was stark.


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