How Clarissa Found Religion, Part III

~ Clarissa

And to conclude this series, I wanted to mention that I’m living with a man who is agnostic, of which I’m extremely respectful and which I would never try or want to change.

If we do have a child, I have already prepared the answer to a question about religion. I’d say the following:

“I believe A. Daddy believes B. Grandpa and Grandma believe C. There are some people in Israel who believe D. And some people in Egypt believe E. And some folks in India believe F, G, and H. And also there are people called “atheists” who believe I. The great news is that you get to decide for yourself what you want to believe. Or you can start a completely new system of beliefs. And you can change your mind at any time. Isn’t that neat?”

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Published by Clarissa

14 thoughts on “How Clarissa Found Religion, Part III”

  1. I love this. What a great way to introduce your child to religion. And there are some forms of art that are born from or respond to religion that are so beautiful (Milton, Da Vinci, Purcell spring to mind with the Christian tradition.) So if nothing else, I think all educated people should appreciate the art that religion inspires. 🙂

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    1. For me, it is completely wrong to try to impose one’s own religion on a child because if you violate their mind in such a hugely important area, if you don’t even allow them to choose how to relate to issues of life and death, how can you possibly expect them to learn to think for themselves and exercise their judgment in any other aspect of life? I feel that my duty here will be to provide information and then step back to let the person to make their own choices. Which I will then wholeheartedly support, no matter how they might differ from mine.

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      1. What if the child decides to take a literal notion of some religious text? Like s/he believe that wives should serve their husbands; that gay people are evil; that the world is 6000 years old etc etc. How would you handle that? I am now fairly certain that I am not going to have kids so it’s kind of a moot point for me at this point. But it’s always been something I wondered about myself–especially when I was considering children: I can handle anything better than I can a religious fanatic.

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        1. “Like s/he believe that wives should serve their husbands; that gay people are evil; that the world is 6000 years old etc etc.”

          – I don’t see a likelihood of any child of mine believing that. 🙂 You teach by example, by how you live your life. If the kid sees a strong, powerful mother and parents who are passionately pro-gay rights and pro-evolution, I don;t see how that child can start believing stupid things, you know? That’s got to come from somewhere.

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    1. A horrible father like that should not be surprised that his son is trying to escape his pervasive control by any means he can. God, I;m now traumatized by this horrible father.

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  4. I’m largely sold on zeteticism, or “model agnosticism,” so I would phrase it “I believe Daddy believes B,” etc. But I’m also an admirer of Brian, who teaches us that we must figure it out for ourselves. You go, Clarissa.

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  5. Aww, you ended this series too soon! I wanted to know more about how you found religion. How did you deal with it in a society where religion was frowned upon? That account must be fascinating, especially since you were only 11 years old at the time.

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    1. I didn’t really have to deal with it because I never told anybody. And never really felt the need to tell anybody. Except for the blog readers, of course, because I hide nothing from you guys. 🙂

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