Is BDSM Inherently Transgressive or Liberating?

From an interesting post on BDSM:

Far from “pushing the boundaries” and being “transgressive,” BDSM is nothing but the same tired old status quo in a corny rubber slave mask.

Of course, in BDSM (as well as in any other way of practicing human sexuality) the same trends that exist in society at large will be replicated. There is no way of being sexual that is inherently more transgressive or liberating as any other. Transgression and liberation come from people, not from sexual practices or positions. There is no doubt in my mind that there will be the exact same percentage of unconsensual or unfulfilling or manipulative or degrading or dishonest sex in any form of sexuality.

 

6 thoughts on “Is BDSM Inherently Transgressive or Liberating?”

  1. “There is no doubt in my mind that there will be the exact same percentage of unconsensual or unfulfilling or manipulative or degrading or dishonest sex in any form of sexuality.”

    Well said!!!

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  2. I’ve heard it being associated with shamanism, since the practice of BDSM seems to give opportunity for becoming aware of the internal structures of the psyche, but I am skeptical about this to quite a high degree, since it seems to me that one must necessarily trivialise oneself if one learns, for instance, that one is a masochist and says, “Hey, why not?”

    In any case, there is probably little connection between one’s personal sexual propensities and what happens in the world at large. We’re talking microcosms when it comes to individual sexual preference. The macrocosm of social hierarchies and the dominance and submission they reproduce on a macro level is something else.

    Furthermore, there is a tendency for sadists in everyday life to flip and become masochists in order to live out the other side of experience, when they can.

    For all these reasons, I doubt that practicing BDSM leads to any kind of insight.

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  3. There is no doubt in my mind that there will be the exact same percentage of unconsensual or unfulfilling or manipulative or degrading or dishonest sex in any form of sexuality.(Clarissa)

    Bingo, though you could have added all the people who will say that aint so.

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  4. I’m not involved in “BDSM” per se, but I do have some involvement in kink, and kinky folks are some of the happiest, most egalitarian, well-adjusted people you’ll ever meet. We just so happen to enjoy incorporating leather goods, candles, and funky instruments into our sex lives. All that says about us is that we in fact, enjoy incorporating leather goods, candles, and funky instruments into our sex lives.
    Granted, there are people in the kink world who are extremely insecure, and brag way too much about being involved in kink because they think it makes them look cool or edgy, and there are those who have a hard time understanding consent, but that’s true of just about every type of sexual orientation/variety: There are always assholes and there are always people who can’t put their money where their mouth is. Kink’s not unique.

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  5. There is a saying in kink circles:

    I may be submissive but I’m not your submissive

    I would say that the kink environment has a better chance of fostering good relations and less abuse simply because people are encouraged to talk, to set limits, and to know what their own personal limits are. So individually within four walls bdsm and vanilla might be as abusive however overall if you want to explore bdsm you have 10,50,100,1000+ people willing to say whether the other person respects your limits. Would be nice to be able to buy that kind of vetting in the vanilla world where you really have no idea and there is no open dialogue about it.

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  6. “Transgression and liberation come from people, not from sexual practices or positions. There is no doubt in my mind that there will be the exact same percentage of unconsensual or unfulfilling or manipulative or degrading or dishonest sex in any form of sexuality.”

    Well said and I agree.

    Like

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