Of All the Stupid Memes. . .

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Clarissa

July 3, 2013

Huh?

As the resident authority on narcissists, I can assure everybody that they can have iron-clad marriages if they find a partner with a corresponding neurosis. This means that their likelihood of having an unbreakable marriage is exactly as high as anybody else’s.

Narcissists also make the best bloggers. The habit of being highly attentive to the minutest details of one’s existence and feeling the need to share them with the world is obviously very narcissistic. And, of course, I’m not saying this from any sort of personal experience. 🙂

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6 responses to “Of All the Stupid Memes. . .”

el

July 3, 2013

What can a corresponding neurosis be. for example?

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1. bloggerclarissa
  
  July 3, 2013
  
  It can be anything pretty much. A person who wants control will be happy with the one who needs to be controlled, one who craves adoration will be happy with the one needs to adore, a sadist will love a masochist, a talker digs a listener, etc.
  
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musteryou

July 3, 2013

It’s an emotional blackmail meme. It’s along the lines of what an anonymous entity wrote to me a while back, “I hope you’re not a teacher, because you prefaced your speech with the suggestion that most people find this material hard to grasp, which means you think that I am stupid.”

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1. bloggerclarissa
  
  July 3, 2013
  
  I get this from trolls all the time! “What kind of academic are you if you wrote a post I don’t like?”
  
  Idiots.
  
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  1. musteryou
    
    July 3, 2013
    
    it’s discipline and punish from below — a common modern meme.
    
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musteryou

July 3, 2013

Random other thoughts. Narcissism as a style doesn’t really work for me, although I once tried very hard to adapt to it as a cultural norm. It’s because ultimately I relate dialectically and in a very analytical way. So I can’t just put myself out there and receive adulation. I have to analyse and dissect what it all means. Western people who adopt a narcissistic style take this as a sign I am uncertain of myself, a view that is enhanced if I have attempted to adopt the mode of seeming to be full of swagger and self-confidence in the first instance.

As I mature, I find my natural style is much quieter than that which I take to be the Western cultural norm. Indeed, I also perceive that even the Western cultural norm is changing and the attitude of quiet self-confidence that Julia Gillard adopted seems to be evolving into one aspect of the cultural norm.

So I don’t try to be the forced extrovert regarding matters that don’t naturally interest me these days. If I’m not competitive financially, that doesn’t bother me. If I have a narrow range of interests (philosophy and martial arts and camping), that’s just the way it is. I’m not obliged to try to perform in a circus only to be told that isn’t good enough. As I said, I don’t reap many rewards from even a successful circus trick, since I don’t work for praise but to gain more material to analyse. The rewards and punishments for pretty tricks therefore always seem disproportionate to the efforts I put in — that is, if they do not give me intellectual grist for the mill.

Over the years it seems I don’t get gratification from narcissistic supply, but rather this bombastic approach to life interferes with my natural patterns, which are to be low key, at least in terms of mood and attitude, no matter what sorts of things I have to say.

I realize that I do offend people sometimes, but it’s easier to see the nature of the offence and how realistic it is when the terrain is not covered with a fog of egoistic needs and expectations. Also, my cultural errors of not following through with an egoistic mindset after I have seemed to set out with one are obviated when I do not try to conform to such cultural mores in the first place.

At least people can see in the first instance, “Oh, she’s not cut out for sales or being a superstar…” I’m far too dialectical.

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