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Self-Defeating Students

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Clarissa

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In the course evaluations, two out of 13 students complained that instead of multiple choice tests I assign essays. The self-defeating stupidity of such complaints literally nauseates me.

I am absolutely convinced that an instructor who assigns multiple choice in limited-enrollment seminars in the Humanities is defrauding the students. The only benefit of such assignments is that they are super-easy to grade. Other than that, they accomplish absolutely nothing and have no pedagogical or educational value.

Multiple choice doesn’t teach any marketable skill, doesn’t prepare for the workplace, does not promote thinking and analysis. They are based on stupid, mechanical memorization at best and guesswork at worst.

Instead of this fraudulent practice, I offer students an opportunity to work with me in a one-on-one format to improve their writing and their logical reasoning skills. I give very extensive comments on each essay that are individually tailored to each student. While multiple choice assignments can be graded by a five-year-old and offer zero useful feedback (unless you believe that “16 out of 20” us very useful), my assignments show that I invest a lot of my own time and effort into helping students learn.

Still, in every group there is a couple of students who prefer to be dismissed with an MC assignment. It boggles the mind that anybody could be so into instant gratification that they prefer to get some meaningless grade (that will in no way affect their chances of employment) than acquire useful knowledge.

We keep feeling sorry for the students who have to take out loans to get higher education. But I can’t find a whole lot of compassion in me for people who get into debt and then piss away the very opportunity they are mortgaging their future to get. I was a student in dire financial straits, too, when I was their age. Thankfully, none of my professors ever dismissed me with some stupid MC assignment. If they had, however, that is what I would be complaining about. It would have never occurred to me to complain about people who actually engaged with me and tried to help me learn.

10 responses to “Self-Defeating Students”

  1. Avatar
    Anonymous

    “We keep feeling sorry for the students who have to take out loans to get higher education. But I can’t find a whole lot of compassion in me for people who get into debt and then piss away the very opportunity they are mortgaging their future to get.

    Sounds like these students should go to the Draper University of Heroes where they can get their C.A. (Change Agent) qualification so they can be the next Silcon Valley billionaire.

    http://nymag.com/news/features/draper-university-silicon-valley-2013-8/

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  2. N G Avatar
    N G

    “We keep feeling sorry for the students who have to take out loans to get higher education. But I can’t find a whole lot of compassion in me for people who get into debt and then piss away the very opportunity they are mortgaging their future to get.”

    Sounds like these students should join the Draper University of Heroes where they can get their C.A. (Change Agent) qualification and become the next Silicon Valley billionaires.

    http://nymag.com/news/features/draper-university-silicon-valley-2013-8/

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  3. Titfortat Avatar
    Titfortat

    If they had, however, that is what I would be complaining about. It would have never occurred to me to complain about people who actually engaged with me and tried to help me learn.(Clarissa)

    I think for some of these kids its because they have been pushed into “higher” learning. They have been sold on the idea that for them to get anywhere in life they need formal education. This is where the problem lies for many of them and I can understand the reason why they would prefer just a multiple choice format. They just want to get out with their little piece of paper and get on with “real life”.

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  4. djiril Avatar
    djiril

    Sheesh! I remember one geography class where I took obsessively detailed notes in class, spent hours slaving over the textbook and copying the diagrams and could still never manage to get better than a C on the mostly multiple-choice test because I could never remember the exact name of some concept. If there has been more essay questions I could have demonstrated my knowledge of the subject better, but I couldn’t guess what words I needed to memorize (they were often different ones than were highlighted in the text.) All of this was despite a passionate interest in the subject and some very good lectures.
    Multiple-choice does not necessarily mean easier.

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  5. Evelina Anville Avatar
    Evelina Anville

    I agree. I find it hopelessly depressing when students beg me to teach badly.

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  6. cliff arroyo Avatar
    cliff arroyo

    MC tests are a joke because they measure real knowledge more poorly than any other format I can think of (that’s actually widely used).

    I’ve heard it said (and my experience bears this out) that the students that best understand the material by other measures do worse on MC tests than those who have a basic grasp of the material and no more. The better I know the subject the more likely I am to read different shades of meaning into the question and answers and that usually fouls things up.

    On the other hand, I remember an undergraduate course that I was sort of looking forward to but turned out to be excruciatingly boring (in poli sci).
    Most of the grade was based on a series of MC tests. My strategy was to go to class (where I didn’t pay much attention), cram a few hours before the test (not trying to actually learn anything, just trying to learn the names of ideas and some general associations) and then chose the answer that seemed most associated with what seemed like some kind of key word in the question. I got an A on every test and remembered very little. I also got an A on the parts that required actually learning something an applying it but objectively I shouldn’t have gotten more than a C for the course.

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    1. bloggerclarissa Avatar
      bloggerclarissa

      When I imagine how many of my colleagues sit there inventing 3-4 wrong answers to accompany each correct answer, I begin to suspect that the world has gone insane. How is that a productive use of anybody’s time?

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      1. Evelina Anville Avatar
        Evelina Anville

        “When I imagine how many of my colleagues sit there inventing 3-4 wrong answers to accompany each correct answer, I begin to suspect that the world has gone insane. How is that a productive use of anybody’s time?”

        I couldn’t agree more. Professionally speaking, it’s a far better intellectual exercise to write essay questions. Even sadder however, is that I imagine that many professors who use multiple choice tests don’t even use their own and instead rely on pre-fab tests from texts book publishers–and that’s truly a crime……

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  7. Z Avatar
    Z

    It’s very interesting being in the MOOCs for this reason. I have noticed that: MC tests for grades, cause me not to do the reading and to guess on the test. MC reading and listening comprehension questions, that aren’t graded, I actually don’t mind or even sort of like. In the MOOC where we had MC tests for grades, everyone was p.o.’d at the prof all the time. In the current MOOC we have to write 8 short papers in 1 semester, no tests. People are thrilled and engaged and say they wish all their MOOCs were like this.

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    1. bloggerclarissa Avatar
      bloggerclarissa

      I hope my students get to understand the difference between MC tests and actual grading before they graduate.

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A conservative literary critic and college professor

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