Vargas Llosa’s Civilization of Spectacle has its uses aside from being a manual on how to state the painfully obvious in the most self-righteous manner ever.

Llosa points out the enormous harm modern anthropology has caused to the concept of culture. At my university, the Department of Anthropology still tries to ban everybody else from using the word “culture” because, according to our anthropologists, nobody should be allowed to talk about culture but them.

Also, Llosa ridicules Bakhtin. This might seem like an outdated project but visit a scholarly conference in my field, and you’ll see Bakhtin trotted out on regular occasions in complete earnestness. 

Of course, these ideas are also quite stale. They are, however, marginally a little less stale than everything else in Llosa’s book. Or maybe I simpy like to see them repeated as many times as possible.

Instead of fighting to add photos of naked men to those of naked women, weirdos masking as feminists in the UK wave their prudishness around like a flag.

Recently, Spain has destroyed all of its reproductive rights, and it seems like the UK is following in the same direction. One sign of this descent into puritanical barbarity is the incapacity of the country’s government to oppose anything to gender segregation in UK’s universities. British “feminists” choose to fight boobs instead of fighting segregation. Europe is squirming in a fit of intense puritanism and destroying all of its achievements in the sphere of gender equality and sexual freedom.

I thank reader Kathleen for the link.

One of my most favorite makeup products in the world is Big Beautiful Eyes from Benefit. The packaging looks a little frumpy but the product is amazing.

Those for us who are all thumbs will find it unexpectedly easy to create a beautiful, very discreetly enhanced eye with this palette. When I’m at the swimming pool, I use this palette to go from a “Disheveled Swimmer” look to an “Esteemed Academic” look in two minutes.

This product is expensive but it is so good that I can never resist the temptation. I’m on my 3 box and I know it will not be the last one.

I’m not a huge fan of Benefit because their products always seem a little superfluous. This palette, though, is a definite success.

P.S. The same eye-shadow palette can be found in this cheaper product by Benefit but I don’t know much about the other products in this kit.

According to this quiz on American pronunciations, I’m either from Pembroke Pines or from Fort Lauderdale. These are two towns in Florida that are located closely to each other but that I have never visited.

Of course, it was unfair to the quiz to test it on an immigrant.

What I find very curious is that American people do not identify with their states. Even those who have lived in the same state their entire life do not identify with it. Whenever I try to start a conversation about a specific state with one of its inhabitants, I encounter nothing but puzzled boredom.

Instead, people identify with their regions. Regional stereotypes are a topic that always attracts an unflagging and I’d even say hungry sort of interest. And this interest is independent of people’s social class or profession. If you are at a party and there is an uncomfortable silence, just say, “So I traveled to the West Coast recently and, ugh, it’s so different!”

After that, you don’t have to worry about people having a good time for at least 40 minutes. The stereotypes will fly.

It’s seems like “United Regions of America” would make for a more realistic name.

The biggest news on Russian TV is that the Obamas are getting divorced. Every newscast on the most popular state-sponsored channel has been gleefully mulling over this news for days. I get the feeling the Russians are on the verge of organizing public festivities to celebrate.

Does anybody know where this is coming from?

So I just discovered that a book titled History of the Nation and Spanish Nationalism was published in Spain last month. It’s 1536 pages long. Costs EUR 37,05. Of course, none of the libraries in our sharing system have it. And even if they did, what’s the point of checking out a book of this length, especially if you plan to use it for years to come?

I have resisted every temptation this holiday season but this is one to which I am about to succumb.

Falling. . . falling. . . fallen.

Regional stereotypes are very weird. I never have the slightest idea of what people even mean by them. They sound like they are spoken in code. Yesterday at the Christmas Eve dinner, for instance, I mentioned that I had lived on the East Coast for several years.

“The East Coast!” one woman exclaimed. “People are very rushed there.”

“Yes, very rushed!” another guest said. Everybody looked at me for confirmation.

“Rushed?” I asked, unsure of what people were trying to communicate to me.

“Yes, rushed,” one guest explained, probably thinking that my English was a little limited. “You know, rushing, running around all the time, always in a hurry.”

Everybody looked at me in eager anticipation.

I realized that people would not settle down until I confirmed this vision of rushing East Coast folks. These days, whenever I go to a social gathering, somebody always announces, “She has a PhD! From Yale! And a bunch of other degrees! And she speaks many languages! And she has lived in different countries! And she recently got a prize for her book!” After that, people look at me like I’m an oracle, speak in hushed voices whenever I enter a room, and check every statement they make against my reaction. This makes it absolutely impossible for me to contradict anything anybody says because that might carry an inordinate weight and hurt feelings. So, of course, I said, “Yes, they sometimes rush.”

To me this stereotype is extremely weird because it seems completely random and meaningless. If people were to say that East Coasters are stuck up and condescending, I would not agree with that but I’d know where this idea comes from. Rushing East Coasters, however, make zero sense.

The same thing happens with other regional stereotypes. Every time I meet a man from a Southern state, he tells me, “Well, you know what they say about Southern men!”

“What do they say?” I ask.

This invariably makes my interlocutor look confused and upset. After a lot of verbal wrangling, I usually manage to make him reveal something along the lines of, “Well, Southern men, we are not like other men, we are gentlemen.” The a new struggle over what it means to be a Southern gentleman ensues.

I have come to realize that a regional stereotype is not supposed to conceal any meaning. Its entire point is to give people a chance to say, “Oh, those Southerners / Midwesterners / East Coasters, etc., you know what they are like!” The statement means the exact opposite of what it says, namely, “I have no idea what they are like, and I don’t care to find out.”

OK, I know everybody is fed up with the Spanish Civil War by this point but this is my new research topic, so gear yourself for at least 3 more years of this, folks. I will try to make it as painless as I can.

Today I just had to share with you this priceless quote from Anthony Beevor’s classic volume The Battle for Spain (which, to my shame, I’m reading now for the very first time):

In the tense spring of 1936 on his way to Madrid University, Julián Marías, a disciple of the phil­osopher José Ortega y Gasset, never forgot the hatred in the expression of a tram-driver at a stop as he watched a beautiful and well-dressed young woman step down onto the pavement. ‘We’ve really had it,’ Marías said to himself. ‘When Marx has more effect than hormones, there is nothing to be done.’

The story may well be apocryphal, but it’s still very funny.

* The title of this post references the title of Isaac Rosa’s ¡Otra maldita novela sobre la Guerra Civil!

We have been invited to a colleague’s place for Christmas Eve dinner. At the last moment, the colleague said – amidst endless apologies – that it would be nice if I could bring something by way of dessert. So I made this last minute cherry-apple cake:

Not only is it pretty enough for a Christmas table, it is also very easy to make. Here is what you need to do.

1. Take one and a half sticks of unsalted butter (about 150 grams) and soften it in the microwave. This takes about 25-30 seconds. Mix it up with half a cup of sugar (more if you like sweeter desserts.) Make sure you mix it very well. Then mix in one egg.

2. Now add 4-5 egg yolks. I have these beautiful orange-yolked eggs that I get from a local farmer:

Mmm, pretty!

3. Add half a teaspoon of baking powder and mix everything up. Now slowly add about 2 cups of flour, mixing it in very well. Take some pitted cherries (or any other kind of berries you have) and mix them gently into the batter. Place the batter in a buttered baking dish:

4. Now cut an apple and arrange it on top of the batter like a flower:

5. Heat the oven to 350F and place the baking dish there for about 50 minutes. Here is how the finished cake (or, rather, pie, isn’t it?) looks:

Nothing could be easier!

Merry Christmas, folks!