Elon Musk is the only person outside of Ukraine who is genuinely helping in a big way:
This is very impressive because he really doesn’t have to.
On the Other End
Oh. So there really are people typing up a storm on the other end.
The Lonely Voice
We voted 3 times today at the faculty senate. Twice mine was the only voice that said “nay.” Loudly. The third time, I was joined by one other voice.
The upside is that I voted my conscience and that’s always good. The downside is that every time this happens, people want to become my friend. And I have even less time for that now because my cat expects me to play with her every evening. Today she chased me off my bed when I tried to abbreviate my playing duties.
Weird Commercial
This is the weirdest commercial. The company is openly saying that they no longer make cool cars.
“See this incredibly cool car? Well, you can’t get it. We don’t make it anymore!”
I really thought they’d reveal something cool at the end.
Losers.
Fun Colleague
At a soporific faculty meeting, I was granted an unexpected pleasure of sitting next to an extremely entertaining professor from India who told the most hilarious stories about “all those fucking nice white liberal ladies with their fucking DEI”. I don’t know how he knew that I’m a nice white lady who is not liberal but it means he’s good at his profession because his field requires that you should know how to read people.
I haven’t had this much fun at work since…. I don’t even remember since when.
Human Toilets
These guys with body counts treat women like toilets, and women treat them like toilets in return. Then both sides pout at each other because everybody wants to feel extremely special but can’t be assed to be decent to other people.
The Fire Inside
These are all stories from the world that no longer exists. These “tiger” parents are preparing their children for a long-gone economy. I don’t care if they are Chinese, American, or Alpha Centauri. They are behind the times. They have already lost.
The world that currently exists requires internal motivation. The disciplinarian society is gone. We can debate if that’s good or bad but the fact is, it’s now an anachronism. These tiger moms are chasing a dead dragon.
Everything today is about inner motivation. You have to have the fire inside for whatever it is you do. There’s no demand for obedient, quiet drones. You need to have a very strong sense of self. We are in the economy of selfhood.
I spent all evening yesterday telling my kid to be done with the studying already and just go and play. She refused and at bedtime showed me a timesheet of her own design where she recorded how much time she had spent on each field of study. This is not assigned at school. I have never asked her to do this. I have never asked her to study at all. I’m not doing anything to foster it. But I do intuitively know how to raise for inner motivation. You do it by pursuing the exact opposite strategy from tiger-momming.
We live in an extremely permissive, self-indulgent society. Maybe I wish it were less so. But it won’t be. The boundary between happiness and unhappiness in such a society lies inside everybody individually. You need to build an inner caparace for your fire and police its boundaries maniacally in order not to spill like a puddle of grey misery. Everybody will have to do it for themselves or they are majorly screwed. As a parent, you need to foster inner strength, not break it.
Somebody Else’s Money
This is the problem with the socialist mentality in a nutshell:
In the hours before he wrote this post, Senator Sanders (or his aide) spent money on whatever he wanted to spend it on. And he didn’t spend money on whatever he didn’t feel like. Yet when Jeff Bezos did the same, it’s supposed to be a problem.
It’s his money, little dude. It’s vulgar to bitch about how people spend their money. Raising the issue of jewelry Bezos bought for his wife is extremely vulgar. Stop counting other people’s money. Stop trying to tell them how to spend it. If somebody is willing to donate to the causes you care about, show gratitude. If they aren’t willing, it’s their prerogative.
I’m not a huge fan of Bezos but I despise these attempts to spend somebody else’s money.
Book Notes: Alice Feeney’s My Husband’s Wife
My friends, if you are into the mystery / mommy lit genre, you need to be reading Alice Feeney. She’s the best on the market right now. Her new novel My Husband’s Wife is excellent. There are surprises on every page. The novel is very well-plotted and hammers home the idea that there’s nothing more important than family. Don’t be a stupid workaholic. Don’t cheat. Don’t be a prima donna who’s jumping from bed to bed in search of excitement. Go home and be with your family, the novel says. Hold your child close and thank heavens that you have a child.
Feeney writes a lot about the children scarcity. This is a common thread among her books but My Husband’s Wife is her best. It’s really a perfectly plotted mystery. Scorned wives, betrayals, a shady tech company that promises to predict the date of your death. Massive amounts of enjoyment.
Work Parents
I don’t have a work husband, although I’m not as opposed to the concept as many people are. But I do have work daddies. My Associate Deans are usually my work daddies, and I’m already on my third one, with the exact same kind of relationship with each of them. I activate protective feelings in them. It’s a good thing because it makes for a great work process.
Many people at my department treat me like their mom, including much older colleagues. I hate it and can’t wait to rehome them to somebody else.
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