If there is something in your partner (friend, co-worker, boss, etc) that really really bugs you and has been bugging you for a while, it means you need the partner (friend, employee, boss, etc) to keep exhibiting this trait because you need to keep feeling the way this trait makes you feel.
This is especially true if this is not the first partner (co-worker, friend, etc) who’s been bugging you with this particular trait.
Clarissa's Blog 
I’m confused. Are you being sarcastic?
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I would bet a lot of money she isn’t.
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If you didn’t need to feel this way, you’d have solved the issue already, or at the very least stopped picking people who bug you in that particular way. Makes sense.
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Something that my husband does that drives me insane is that he frequently puts things in the wrong place. That is — he’ll put the milk in the cupboard instead of the refrigerator and then put the cereal in the fridge. Or he’ll put cheese in the freezer, which is something he did recently and only discovered it this morning when he was lamenting that we were out of cheese. I can’t tell you how many gallons of milk have been sacrificed in this way over the last 15 years. I used to get so pissed off about it, but I realized that he’s 41 and never going to change. (He has pretty severe ADHD, so it’s hard for him not to get distracted when doing routine tasks.) So I simply keep tabs on where the perishable foods are in case he’s messed up again. Ever since I started doing that, my rage has decreased substantially.
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I should say in the first sentence “used to drive me insane.” It’s gotten better since I adapted to him.
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University has not given raises (but has cut benefits and subsidies) since 2007 despite our efforts and we have not gotten better jobs despite our efforts. So, the meaning of this is that we need to feel economically pinched?
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I don’t conduct psychoanalysis online. 🙂
But I can share that in my own analysis I did address the issue of why I’m always indigent, always drowning in debt, always worried about money. And I did discover that this is a situation that I keep recreating for myself because I have a deep need of it.
Mind you, I said “I.”
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Yes, I am aware of psychoanalytic angle, just never sure at what point this becomes victim blaming or just illogical … you had a deep need for whatever, therefore you were born in a certain historical era, etc.
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This only works when applied to oneself, so victim-blaming is out.
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You might be interested in the magical best seller “The Secret”.
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Yes, I know, one of the most successful scams ever. 🙂
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It pulled in a lot of people, even those I know.
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There are also “letters of happiness” that you need to send to 15 people to be happy. Or is that only a 3rd world phenomenon?
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Chain letters. Those have been around for a while.
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