The Madness of Inclusivity

~ Clarissa

In their efforts to be “inclusive” some people go completely nuts:

It’s great to see Zuckerberg finally acknowledging the many ways in which people use Facebook. When he used the platform back in August to speak publicly about the three miscarriages he and his wife experienced, it appears he understood the power of Facebook to share news and stories that aren’t exactly likable.

Not only does it turn out that a man can have a miscarriage, he is actually listed as the primary miscarrier. Gosh, some women hate themselves so much that they can’t accept the basic and obvious fact that men don’t get pregnant, don’t miscarry, don’t give birth, and don’t breastfeed. It’s like a woman can’t even avoid having her bodily functions colonized by men.

Somehow, I’m not seeing any men referring to their testicles and penis as “ours.” Like in “my wife and I have been having some pus coming out of our penis” or “my girlfriend and I like to tuck our balls snugly into the briefs.”

Women, wake up. Your reproductive organs are yours and yours alone. Just like men’s reproductive organs are only theirs.

Yes, the linked article is on a different subject but that subject is so trivial it’s offensive to my sensibilities.

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Published by Clarissa

8 thoughts on “The Madness of Inclusivity”

  2. Not only does it turn out that a man can have a miscarriage, he is actually listed as the primary miscarrier. Gosh, some women hate themselves so much that they can’t accept the basic and obvious fact that men don’t get pregnant, don’t miscarry, don’t give birth, and don’t breastfeed. It’s like a woman can’t even avoid having her bodily functions colonized by men.
    It has nothing to do with inclusivity and everything to do with patriarchy. Zuckerberg is an important man, Priscilla Chan gets to be his appendage (in this story).

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  3. I heard “we are pregnant” type of comment. Imo, in addition to patriarchy, it’s also a non nefarious male attempt to feel and express to others that the man in question is also a (mental) participant, even if he doesn’t participate physically. Often, after giving birth, a woman and a child become a unit, while a man feels cast aside. Using the inclusive language “we are …” may be an attempt not to be left behind, to stay near a woman during the entire process.

    In case of miscarriages, he probably wanted to say that he also feels the pain and is affected.

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    1. “I heard “we are pregnant” type of comment. Imo, in addition to patriarchy, it’s also a non nefarious male attempt to feel and express to others that the man in question is also a (mental) participant, even if he doesn’t participate physically.”

      • I would so hate that if my partner did that. It’s like, even at such a time you can’t manage not to make things about you, gosh.

      ” Often, after giving birth, a woman and a child become a unit, while a man feels cast aside.”

      • This is a big problem, I agree, especially for people in their twenties. And yes, people need to prepare for the transition of the baby from a body part to a person. For some, it takes decades to do that. 🙂

      “In case of miscarriages, he probably wanted to say that he also feels the pain and is affected.”

      • If it were any other physical affliction, we’d all see how inappropriate the “But I suffer, too!” reaction is. Imagine referring to your partner’s flu as “we have the flu”. That would be really creepy.

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      1. Besides, this “our pregnancy” thing can lead to serious legal repercussions. If it’s “our pregnancy”, then the question arises of who should have the right to control it.

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  4. I observed a case in which a man felt disconnected from his pregnant wife and felt the growing fetus (and then a child) was alien to him. If inclusive language helps some men not to go down this path, I would take it any day over alienation.

    \ Somehow, I’m not seeing any men referring to their testicles and penis as “ours.” Like in “my wife and I have been having some pus coming out of our penis”

    Pus is a medical issue, like the flu. Trying to create a child is different.

    Btw, I decided to comment after reading “short comments expressing approval of a post are highly appreciated.” 🙂 I don’t say there isn’t some truth in your words, but I don’t think it’s always as black and white issue as you described.

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    1. “I observed a case in which a man felt disconnected from his pregnant wife and felt the growing fetus (and then a child) was alien to him. If inclusive language helps some men not to go down this path, I would take it any day over alienation.”

      • It is an enormous mistake to think that anybody but a certified mental health professional can treat this problem. What you are describing needs to be taken to a specialist and not treated with homegrown cures.

      “Pus is a medical issue, like the flu. Trying to create a child is different.”

      • We all know how I feel about the enormous importance of a father to a child. However, it is undeniable that pregnancy and delivery are a woman’s creative work and even with the most loving and supportive partner it is definitely a very lonely enterprise. All of this “we are pregnant” stuff is such a hypocrisy aimed at mothering a grown man by a woman who is already weakened and exhausted by the work of pregnancy. I hate this kind of thing.

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