Life has reduced me to the indignity of eating vegan hot dogs. And you know what? They are not half bad. There are moments when they almost feel like the real deal.
N wants to take me out to a fancy restaurant for our 11th anniversary but now I’m thinking maybe I prefer to stay home, clutching a packet of these fake dogs in my hand.
What brand are they? I had some good vegan hotdogs years ago, but I bought some recently and they were so bad I threw them out. Also curious how you cooked them.
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Lightlife. But now I want to try other brands.
The only way we ever cook hot dogs in my culture is to boil them. Which I know is weird but it’s our thing.
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Unless you buy the most expensive ones, ‘real’ hot dogs are made from mechanically recovered meat leftovers that they can’t do anything else with, bulked out with soya and cornstarch and loaded with salt. They’re full of saturated fats and nitrates. Give me vegan ones any day and I’m not a vegan.
A conservative literary critic and college professor
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