Day: May 27, 2024

Psychological Insight into Maturity

~ Clarissa ~ 12 Comments

People said they wanted psychological insights. OK, I’m happy to oblige.

If you are over the age of 30, you shouldn’t be having emotions when somebody criticizes a lifestyle that happens to be yours. If a football player says that women should be into childbearing above anything else or a random woman online criticizes men who carry water bottles, it’s perfectly normal to joke, shitpoast, quote for clicks, etc. But if it actually upsets or angers you (and you know deep inside whether it does), that’s a sign that you are having a problem with reaching maturity.

Real adulthood is when getting upset that somebody doesn’t approve of your lifestyle sounds exotic. The locus of approval or disapproval moves inside. A mature individual has a system of values in place, and that system is impervious to strangers.

If you observe this issue in yourself, the solution isn’t to panic or feel bad about it. Trace which issue specifically knocks you back into a defensive, child-like role. The examples I gave, for example, speak to femininity/masculinity. Judging by the extreme reaction of many people to these recent scandals, this is a complicated issue for many. That’s fine, it happens. If you feel that this is a touchy subject for you, start asking yourself, “Why do I feel that I’m not in full control of this? Why do I find it threatening? What would it feel like to be confident enough in my choices that this kind of thing wouldn’t be threatening?”

When you are 24, and somebody says, “all women / all men should…”, it’s completely normal and healthy to get sore. If you are 34 and you still get sore over it, that’s not great. And if you are 44, you should really be over it big time. Beyond that age, I’m not even saying.

Only 30 Years Ago

~ Clarissa ~ 3 Comments

Elizabeth George’s In the Presence of the Enemy was published almost 30 years ago. One of the main characters is a far-left tabloid journalist obsessed with bringing down the Tory government. He has an 8-year-old son who happens to be somewhat girly. Back then nobody could conceive of reformatting such children medically and surgically, so the far-left Dad limits his efforts to make the little boy more dudely to giving long, tedious speeches about the importance of masculinity and a plan to enroll the son in an all-male boarding school.

At the end of the novel, Dad realizes he was being an idiot and there’s no need to toughen up the child who, in spite of loving dance and flowers, is plenty tough already. And the only reason Dad was hung up on his son’s imaginary girliness is that the father had been molested as a child and feared the boy would be molested, too, if somebody perceived him as feminine. [This is the tiniest of subplots, so you will still very much enjoy the novel if you decide to read it].

Only 30 years ago, and it was possible to resolve this issue without physically invading a child and modifying his body.

Honestly, if what we have now is progress, then to hell with that kind of progress, don’t you think?

The Price of Open Borders

~ Clarissa ~ 1 Comment

The Russian dude is “from Chicago” but worked for a company “in New Jersey” while trawling around North Carolina. The company’s owner is Moldovan while everybody else working there is Russian. Obviously, everybody is in the country illegally, and “the company” is nowhere to be found.

Open borders was such an excellent idea. It doesn’t bear imagining what kind of operatives from which sorts of regimes are crossing into the US right now and in perpetuity because this process will never be stopped now. We’ve already brought in brutal gangs and drug cartels, now it’s spies. What the bloody Chechen are we even doing?