I’m listening to a book I was sent for blind peer-review but there are so many paeans to me in it that I keep stopping to contemplate my wonderfulness whenever I come across the next bit of praise. As a result, the reading is not progressing much.
Month: October 2024
Revelations about JD Vance
What’s next, the shocking revelation that h eats oatmeal for breakfast? Really scraping the bottom here, folks.
This is a normal speaking fee for a bestselling author.
And then people tell me to take Politico seriously as a news source.
Desperate Girl
On the one hand, what can possibly possess a woman to accept airplane tickets and trips to friends’ weddings two months after meeting a dude? It kind of seems that she saw him that one time in Nevada and then immediately became a rent-a-date for a wedding visit.
The dude, though, is also quite a gift. It’s clear why he has to rent women he dislikes to attend weddings with him. No normal woman would be caught dead around him.
The absolute prize in the situation, though, is the mom. Instead of gently explaining to the daughter the concept of “a desperate girl” and how off-putting it is to be one, the mother pushes her to act in an even more undignified manner.
Joke Made Reality
I thought it was a joke about a dude who was so lazy that his parents had to hide under the bed and shake it when a girl came by because he wouldn’t be able to complete the act otherwise.
No Enthusiasm
Obama says “we are not seeing the same type of enthusiasm and support as when I was running.”
Yes, dude, because then you won and we all saw the results.
Let Me Be Clear
In what concerns profiling, I learned that the people who often repeat “let me be clear” suffer from mental fog. When you are completely clear, you don’t need to say that you are planning to be completely clear.
Doing for Myself
I’m blessed in many ways but I haven’t been blessed with an opportunity to teach literature or talk about books at work. You all know that this is something I’m very good at but it’s sadly not needed where I am.
So in the best neoliberal spirit, I’m going to do for myself and create my own opportunity finally to teach literature. In Ukraine. Who could have bloody thought but life is funny that way. The Ukrainian professors who invited me wrote today to say that I’m a saint because I’m not managing to transmit how very self-serving I’m being with this project.
The Bret Baier Interview of Harris
I wasn’t going to watch the interview because I have an early public appearance tomorrow but I decided to see just a snippet and now I’m heaving with laughter, tears streaming down my face and my throat raw.
It’s pure comedic gold, people. It’s not OK to laugh at cognitively challenged individuals but I think you get a pass if such an individual is trying to get elected president.
I’m going to be all swollen and hoarse at my talk tomorrow but I don’t even care. Please watch if you get a chance. Watch with a loved one because nothing brings people closer than a shared laugh. I’ll give no spoilers because I don’t want to rob you of enjoyment.
I’m Prejudiced
Why do we need early voting if we have a whole day off work on Election Day? We have an early voting station on campus yet November 5 is a holiday. This makes no sense.
I’m prejudiced against people who are into early voting.
Political Operative
“Mommy, have you observed that the cost of living is rising?” asks my 8-year-old on the way to school.
“Why? Do you need me to buy something?”
“No, but I do need you to vote for Donald Trump to make sure that this stops happening.”
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