Clarissa's Blog

Here is a quote from Maynard’s memoir The Best of Us that describes her dating life in her late fifties:

He always paid for dinner, and it’s a sorry truth that I noticed and liked this behavior.

As a woman who dated extensively for 9 years and never, not once, in absolutely no circumstances allowed any man to pay for me anywhere, I find the behavior Maynard describes to be embarrassing. Whether you let men (or women, or relatives, or rich friends) pay for you is a matter of great indifference to me. Be whoever you are but just be honest about it. If you like men to pay, yippee for you. If you don’t, also yippee. But pretending that you don’t when in reality you do at the not-so-juvenile age of 57 is really pathetic.

First, you cudgel a guy over the head with how you are a hugely independent feminist, and then judge him for believing you and trying not to insult you with offers of paying. I understand if you are 17 but at 57 it’s way too late for these games.