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How Do You Cope?

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Clarissa

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If you are betrayed and disappointed by a group of people, what do you do? What is your coping mechanism?

Mine is that I tell the story to several people in a row. Not at once because it’s the repetition of the story that helps. I understand that this is a very female way to cope. What do men do?

9 responses to “How Do You Cope?”

  1. methylethyl Avatar
    methylethyl
    1. Wave of panic.
    2. Tell a couple of people (this is a reality check: did this really happen? Is it really what I think it is? Am I overreacting? Did I misread the situation?).
    3. Pray for everyone involved. Ask God to bless them, that their needs be met, and to preserve them (and me) from all the ill-wishing I directed at them. Because I totally did that. Go to confession.
    4. Re-frame it so that I get something positive out of it: learning opportunity, personal growth, God was saying no to that because we’re supposed to be doing something else right now.
    5. Thank God.

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    1. methylethyl Avatar
      methylethyl

      I carefully numbered those bullet points 1 through 5.

      The combox interface transposed that into LOWERCASE LETTERS so it looks like a 7yo wrote it, between clicking “reply” and the thing posting.

      WHY??

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  2. Avatar
    Anonymous

    “WHY??”

    Silly question! The OBVIOUS answer is that Clarissa’s website uses the WordPress program, which has always hated commenters, and displays that hatred by periodically screwing around with their posts to make them look like idiots.

    Dreidel

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  3. Demotrash Avatar
    Demotrash

    I struggle to answer this question because I cannot recall many times in my life that I felt betrayed by a group of people. I guess I felt betrayed by Democrats at one time, but that’s fairly abstract.

    Liked by 1 person

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  4. Avatar
    Anonymous

    I’m not a man. I usually have to talk to many people about it I have in the past written extensively about things like this in my journal.
    – Amanda

    Liked by 1 person

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  5. PaulS Avatar
    PaulS

    One option is just to walk away and leave. If you can’t or don’t want to, then get together with like-minded people to discuss potential strategies to deal with the situation.

    https://dailyfriend.co.za/2025/04/10/the-ancs-and-das-fates-are-bound-together/

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    1. Clarissa Avatar
      Clarissa

      These are the colleagues at my department who decided that a great solution to our problems is to sell me out to the administration. Which anybody who isn’t a total naive dupe like myself could have anticipated.

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      1. PaulS Avatar
        PaulS

        One thing is that even if you hold fairly fundamentalist views, you are generally better off aligning with the largest group that you broadly agree with if you want to retain any influence.

        https://dailyfriend.co.za/2024/05/24/im-over-small-fry-heres-my-endorsement/

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  6. oldcowboy3 Avatar
    oldcowboy3

    Men are straight forward, because that is how the hemispheres of our brains function. But we are not simple, we measure everything, that is how our civilization, in fact gow every civilization, was built. Sure, some men see only in shades of gray, but most can see about a dozen colours. However, avocado is not a colour, it is a fruit. Now I believe that puce probably looks like it sounds, but have no idea what a mauve might be ;-D.

    All joking aside, by now many men have encountered AA or DEI. Regardless of how one camouflages the cheating, it is a fundamental betrayal of justice, and a man’s; sense of fair play; it is a bloody good thing that we are trained as children to be stoic gentle giants.

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A conservative literary critic and college professor

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