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What a Guy Did

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Clarissa

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The image didn’t load at once, and I wondered what it was that a guy did TO her best friend. I suspected some sort of a perversion from the outraged tone of the tweet.

Then the image loaded.

I personally think it’s mega cute. What these women are bitching about is a mystery. The guy is making an effort, expressing himself clearly, not offering anything degrading like a “situationship” or whatever they call it.

N, by the way, declared the nature of his interest in me very clearly and specifically on our first date. No dessert was involved because I don’t like it but I truly appreciated the clarity of what he was pursuing. This was 18 years ago next week, and I still treasure that memory.

18 responses to “What a Guy Did”

  1. Stringer Bell Avatar
    Stringer Bell

    With friends like these…

    I have a feeling that many women give awful romantic advice to their girlfriends.

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. Ileana Avatar
      Ileana

      That would be really immature. You are either interested or not.

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  2. TomW Avatar
    TomW

    I see this as a moment of clarity situation. If you are on a third date, there is clearly some level of mutual interest, but it’s not enough to be entirely sure about things. If your gut response is “cute and romantic”, I’d see that as confirmation that the interest is real and the relationship could go somewhere. But if the gut response is “creepy”, there probably wasn’t enough real interest for the relationship to have ever had a chance. Of course, this has to be YOUR response, you absolutely can’t ask your friends about it.

    Liked by 2 people

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    1. Clarissa Avatar
      Clarissa

      I agree she was simply not into him but under no circumstances does this count as creepy. The guy clearly expressed what he was looking for. That is good and commendable and everybody should do more of that.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. oldcowboy3 Avatar
        oldcowboy3

        Yeah, but it always did take confidence. Contrary to the song, love is “only for the lucky and the strong” ;-D

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        1. Clarissa Avatar
          Clarissa

          It takes great confidence, a quality that needs to be supported and celebrated in men in an already excessively feminized culture.

          Liked by 1 person

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          1. oldcowboy3 Avatar
            oldcowboy3

            Having been raised when the sexes still liked each other, I think that we are tragically short of the feminine.

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      2. Avatar
        Anonymous

        I think creepy is highly context-dependent. I’m not that person, I wasn’t there, I can’t really say if it was creepy or not. But whatever we call the negative reaction this person experienced, it was ultimately a good thing because it helped her realize this wasn’t the right thing for her and it saved both of them from wasting more time.

        I agree, it is very good when people clearly express what they are looking for. Of course, there are always going to be lots of people out there who don’t know what they are looking for or can’t be honest with themselves about what they want.

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        1. Stringer Bell Avatar
          Stringer Bell

          I think creepy is highly context-dependent.

          I think it’s pretty much bullshit. Women can either claim that they have a special woman instinct to suss out creepy men or they can claim that there is an epidemic of intimate partner violence in america. Both phenomena can’t occur at the same time.

          Remember the stat floating around that 1 in 3 women in college have been victims of date rape? If true (good news, it’s not), women have to be exceptionally poor judges of personality.

          Liked by 1 person

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          1. Clarissa Avatar
            Clarissa

            That’s a good point.

            Talking about sexual abuse on campus, our resident feminists decided to have female student decorate T-shirts decrying rape on campus. The T-shirts were exhibited in our building.

            Thankfully, female students don’t seem to have much experience with sexual violence, so the T-shirts were either decorated with butterflies and flowers or messages like “you can do it! Reach for the stars!” Instead of an angry exhibit, it was actually quite cute in spite of the many spelling mistakes.

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          2. methylethyl Avatar
            methylethyl

            “Both phenomena can’t occur at the same time.”

            They are both true at the same time. They are not true of the same women.

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            1. cliff arroyo Avatar
              cliff arroyo

              “both true …. not true of the same women”

              Yes, on average women have finer tuned filters in figuring out who they’re deal with (including but not limited to sussing out ‘creepy’ guys) and men are far more likely to engage in dangerous interpersonal violence.

              One problem is that ‘creepy’ is less about potentially dangerous and more about sub-par mating material…

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    2. Stringer Bell Avatar
      Stringer Bell

      Of course, this has to be YOUR response, you absolutely can’t ask your friends about it.

      Couldn’t agree more. This is KEY.

      Liked by 1 person

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      1. Clarissa Avatar
        Clarissa

        The whole point of dating for a woman before she’s ready to get married is to have something to discuss with her friends.

        I’m not joking.

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        1. Stringer Bell Avatar
          Stringer Bell

          Haha I’m learning new things.

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        2. oldcowboy3 Avatar
          oldcowboy3

          LOL, so you are saying that gossip amongst friends ends after they marry ;-D

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          1. Clarissa Avatar
            Clarissa

            No, but then the man does have another purpose.

            Liked by 1 person

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            1. oldcowboy3 Avatar
              oldcowboy3

              LOL, just giving you the gears Kid, it is human nature. My Mom still gossips, and our Neihbourhood Watch ladies, see and tell all ;-D

              Liked by 1 person

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A conservative literary critic and college professor

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