Love is a desire for what we do not have. We don’t fall in love with people who are identical to ourselves. Instead, we seek out the difference. The greater the difference, the deeper the love.
My husband is silent, thrifty, spartan, and modest. I am a gregarious, self-indulgent, prideful spendthrift. I love in him what I don’t have.
If love is one thing which you don’t have, it stands to reason that this should be true for self-love. You don’t love yourself by “being who you are.” To the contrary, true self-love resides in an aspiration to be better.
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