Sign up for a free recipe e-book →

Clarissa's Blog

AI Doesn’t Get Me

Published by

Clarissa

on

Amazon has a new AI feature that is supposed to describe you based on your shopping. I shop on Amazon a lot but its AI has misread me completely:

Aside from the cat care products, none of this is true. I hate grocery delivery, I’m the exact opposite of a vegetarian, and I prefer Gerolsteiner or Borjomi for sparking water.

This part is probably based on the purchases I made for my kid but she hasn’t liked unicorn toys since she was 4:

I’m also quite stunned by “the girl doesn’t read books” part. We are maniacal readers in the family. Unless the girl in question is the cat, there’s no non-reader in our household. Also, we don’t have a girl who dislikes pink in the house:

But the one that really slaughtered me is this:

Every line item on it is wrong but the “has a boyfriend” part is really disturbing. Nobody in the household is of age to have a boyfriend, and the cat is spayed.

11 responses to “AI Doesn’t Get Me”

  1. methylethyl Avatar
    methylethyl

    I looked up mine, and I’m intrigued by everyone else’s answers. Mine are 100% logical and based on previous Amazon purchases. From these, Amazon has concluded that I play the violin regularly, that I am building an electronics component inventory, that I study aviation extensively, that I’m progressing through a math curricula, and that it’s likely I bind and restore books. Oh, and that I maintain a regular filter replacement schedule. The filter thing is true. The rest of that is wildly untrue, but based on purchases I’ve made for others, so not mysterious. It’s also a pretty boring list. So… are all the weird “extras” coming from people’s use of AI assist, Alexa, or an Amazon app on their phone, which is sucking in information from outside your Amazon purchases?

    Like

    Reply
    1. Clarissa Avatar
      Clarissa

      Hey, you are an interesting person. All I do apparently is get grocery deliveries and swim in Lacroix water.

      Maybe I should start studying aviation.

      Like

      Reply
      1. Clarissa Avatar
        Clarissa

        The only source of the boyfriend is that I sometimes buy gifts for my 10yo nephew.

        This AI they’ve got is very dirty-minded if it thinks that the only reason why a mother of a 10yo girl would buy gifts for a boy is that the boy is the daughter’s boyfriend.

        Like

        Reply
        1. Avatar
          Anonymous

          Does it think that the boyfriend is yours?

          Like

          Reply
          1. Clarissa Avatar
            Clarissa

            At least, he’s not my husband’s, so that’s a relief.

            Liked by 1 person

            Reply
    2. Avatar
      Anonymous

      A lot of mine is off kilter but most of it is understandable at least. We don’t have a reptile or someone teaching violin, but I know why that would show up. We for sure use a lot of art supplies and are “intensely interested in educational activities.” It’s fine that they don’t actually know how many kids I have, although it looks like they base that on what size clothes you have ordered in the past. Apparently, 10 and 12 is when we invest in socks and underwear–because that is when it becomes difficult to find the kind they like in stores locally.

      Internal consistency is clearly lagging.

      Like

      Reply
      1. methylethyl Avatar
        methylethyl

        OMG the 10-12 sizes. Why is that so hard? My kid is there now, and probably my online profile thinks I am buying underpants for an entire middle school.

        Like

        Reply
  2. Demotrash Avatar
    Demotrash

    As someone who actually knows and likes the song “set it off,” I’d be shocked if anyone in your household has even heard this 80s electro classic, let alone is a fan of it

    Like

    Reply
    1. Clarissa Avatar
      Clarissa

      And you’re right. I have absolutely no idea where this is even coming from.

      Oh, I know! It must be the boyfriend’s favorite song.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  3. Demotrash Avatar
    Demotrash

    https://x.com/npc_alyx/status/2108092373440122964

    Like

    Reply
  4. Ed Frey Avatar
    Ed Frey

    I’m VERY HAPPY that this is what I found:

    About you

    We haven’t saved anything yet. As you shop on Amazon or chat with Alexa, we’ll save helpful information to personalize your experience.

    Once we have saved some details, you can manage them here.

    Like

    Reply

Leave a comment

A conservative literary critic and college professor

Recent posts