A customs officer stops a Ukrainian at the border.

“Are you carrying any drugs?”

“Yes.”

“Let me see them. Wait this isn’t drugs. This is salo.”

“Yes, it makes me high,” says the Ukrainian with a beatific smile.

I shared this joke so that people understand how important salo is to Ukrainian people. So if you feel like saying, “Ewww, gross!”, please remember that you are hurting the feelings of a Ukrainian person.

Salo is the most traditional Ukrainian foodstuff. It is salted pork fat, which scares most non-Ukrainian people. For Ukrainians, though, it’s sacred. Many people use it to cook (fried potatoes, borscht, all kinds of soups.) The best way to eat it, however, is frozen and cut into very thin strips.

I hadn’t had a chance to eat salo for over 10 years until we discovered it at a Global Foods store in St. Louis. N. says that he finds seeing me eat salo disturbing because I look like I’m participating in some kind of an erotic activity when I do it.