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I’m From Around

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A blogger writes:

I’ve started to really hate being asked “where are you from?” It’s a hard question to answer.

I live in New Zealand now, but I’ve spent two-thirds of my life in the US. I sound mostly American – although not as much as I used to. But my family has been in New Zealand for over a century, and in some cases since the 1840s. (OG pakehas, is what I’m saying.) At this point, I’m probably more comfortable being a Kiwi than an American – although I switch back and forth in search of that parallax view.

I never know how to answer this question either.

If I say “From Ukraine”, people ask me when I arrived, how I like it here, and when I am going “back home.” They also give me large, welcoming smiles, enunciate every word very clearly and loudly, and ask if America is what I imagined it to be. “Hamburgers! Fourth of July! Freedom! McDonald’s!” they yell at me, making me feel very uncomfortable.

If I say “From Canada”, I feel stupid because I have now lived in the US for a total of 9 years as opposed to the 6 years I lived in Canada.

If I say “From St. Louis”, people ask me about my accent and we immediately end up back in the “From Ukraine” scenario.

The way I would prefer to answer, of course, is “In 1998 I emigrated to Canada from Ukraine. Five years later, I went to Connecticut for my graduate studies, after which I moved back to Canada for a year. Then. . .” I notice, however, that people give me terrified looks when I do that.

The best answer I have found to the “So where are you from?” question is the vague “I’m from around. . .”

24 responses to “I’m From Around”

  1. David Bellamy Avatar
    David Bellamy

    I generally say, “This planet.” If the person wants more specific information, I will clarify.

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  2. Shakti Avatar
    Shakti

    I vary my answer depending on who is asking the question. Most people generally don’t deserve or want a full answer as they are looking to fit you into whatever box they have in their head.

    You’re from three places at the same time. I’m from my birthplace, my hometown and my current city. My mother, at this point in her life, has lived for much longer in the US than she has in her country of birth.

    I answer my hometown for people I don’t want to have conversations with. People either accept it, or they freak out and ask me about my ethnicity or where I’m really from. (I have an American midwest accent — which confuses and annoys certain people to no end.)

    I reserve the story for people who aren’t stupid, and are genuinely curious.

    I’m not a third culture kid technically, but I found this book, Third Culture Kids to be very interesting:

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    1. bloggerclarissa Avatar
      bloggerclarissa

      “Most people generally don’t deserve or want a full answer as they are looking to fit you into whatever box they have in their head.”

      – Exactly!

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  3. David Gendron Avatar
    David Gendron

    http://whyevolutionistrue.wordpress.com/2013/03/05/a-new-expose-on-mother-teresa-shows-that-she-and-the-vatican-were-even-worse-than-we-thought/

    Thanks to musteryou for the link.

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    1. bloggerclarissa Avatar
      bloggerclarissa

      The sexism is overwhelming. The hypocrisy is even more so. Is this what the UdeM has come to? Creating nasty gossip about women who dared to work and make a name for themselves?

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      1. David Gendron Avatar
        David Gendron

        The sexism of Mother Theresa is overwhelming.

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        1. bloggerclarissa Avatar
          bloggerclarissa

          And I’m sure she also slept her way to the top. 🙂

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      2. David Gendron Avatar
        David Gendron

        I talked about woman-hating, not sex.

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        1. bloggerclarissa Avatar
          bloggerclarissa

          She’s also fat and ugly.

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          1. bloggerclarissa Avatar
            bloggerclarissa

            And she never smiles. She must be a nag and a shrew.

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            1. bloggerclarissa Avatar
              bloggerclarissa

              And she’s not nurturing enough.

              And her outfits are ugly.

              And she is domineering and manly.

              And she is too aggressive.

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  4. NancyP Avatar
    NancyP

    you are from Cougarland!
    Re: Mother Teresa – she struck me as someone who had an idea but who was not very good at administration and planning – she started a movement but did not structure it well enough or select enough talented administrators to bring her hospice movement up to some degree of professional practice concerning cleanliness, availability of painkillers, etc. Modern successful nursing and teaching orders have tended to place a lot of emphasis on training members in some management skills as well as in the skills indicated by the order’s emphasis (nursing, teaching, etc). At any rate, she had the original concept, but the success or failure of the hospice order is up to the entire order.

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    1. bloggerclarissa Avatar
      bloggerclarissa

      Cougar land is a good answer. 🙂

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  5. Liz Avatar
    Liz

    For a short and sweet response if I were you I would say I am originally From Ukraine, but I’ve lived in the Saint Louis for the last x years.

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  6. musteryou Avatar
    musteryou

    My best answer is “All of Europe has gone into my making.”

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    1. Shakti Avatar
      Shakti

      I can’t quite steal that, but I really like that, Musteryou.

      And now I brainstorm:

      -All of colonialism has gone into my making. (Born in a former British colony, moved to a former British colony, I speak two colonial languages, working on a third, need I go on?)
      -I am the product of tectonic drift.
      -I am a citizen of the world.
      -I am from a plane.
      -I am from a land of meeting rivers.
      -I am from a land of borders.
      -I am from Conjunction Junction. What’s your function?
      -I am from Liliput.
      – I am from Narnia.
      -I am from the land of Nod.
      -I originated from the head of Zeus.
      –I am from the netherworlds. I have come to drag you to hell.
      –I am from the state attorney’s office. You’ve just been served.
      –I’m from Publisher’s Clearing House. You’ve won a trip to get a clue.

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      1. musteryou Avatar
        musteryou

        I love it.

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      2. bloggerclarissa Avatar
        bloggerclarissa

        This is the best. 🙂 🙂

        Especially this “I’m from Publisher’s Clearing House. You’ve won a trip to get a clue.” And this “I am from the state attorney’s office. You’ve just been served.” 🙂 🙂

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  7. Sister Avatar
    Sister

    I say: “I was born in Ukraine” and for some reason it works way better than “I am from Ukraine”.

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  8. Stringer Bell Avatar
    Stringer Bell

    For people who say ‘You speak very good english’, I reply with a ‘Thanks, you too!’.

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  9. Leah Jane Avatar
    Leah Jane

    “I was born in Hawaii, but I spent the last four years in Montana, and now I have lived in Victoria for the past two years”.
    Yeah, I get treated as a fun exotic foreign guest at cocktail parties. 🙂

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  10. Fie Upon This Quiet Life Avatar
    Fie Upon This Quiet Life

    Americans love to hear immigrants stories. I think that it’s because it affirms the American dream, which Americans are not so good at achieving. So when it works for someone else, then we can all pat ourselves on the back and say, “Yep, we still got it!” even if that (a) isn’t true, or (b) doesn’t apply to the person thinking it.

    I know it’s rude to ask people where they are from, but I still enjoy hearing their stories. It’s not because I want to put people in a box and judge them. It’s because I’m interested in people’s stories, and immigrating to another country (let alone two) takes tremendous courage, in my opinion, so I am always in awe of people who do it and respect them tremendously. Most Americans can’t imagine living somewhere else, so when people move to a different country (ours), it comes off as some sort of real-life adventure epic. Of course, your life-story is yours, and you’re not obliged to entertain the rest of us with it. It’s just that we stupid Americans find that sort of thing fascinating. It reifies the American mythology over and over again.

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    1. bloggerclarissa Avatar
      bloggerclarissa

      “I know it’s rude to ask people where they are from, but I still enjoy hearing their stories.”

      – No, no, I don’t think it’s rude at all. I’m only finding the question problematic because I still haven’t found an answer that wouldn’t go on for 15 minutes. As an autistic, I do tend to answer the ‘How are you?’ question with a detailed update about my life. 🙂 So I have to be extra careful not to do this.

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  11. NancyP Avatar
    NancyP

    ..the land of f***ing deer? Especially considering that long, long driveway past the forest…

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A conservative literary critic and college professor

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