Like Me

Turns out Klara detests fruit that has been cut into pieces and prefers to hold a whole strawberry or a whole pear, even if it’s clear she’ll never finish it. Just like me! I also only eat whole fruit and vegetables and hate it when people take a perfectly good tomato and quarter it, making it uneatable.

At least, there’s something Klara has in common with me. She looks so identical to N that people laugh when they see them together and go, “Hey, I guess you won’t need a paternity test.” And with me it’s always, “Oh, so she’s yours? Is this your mommy, little girl?” And Klara, who unlike me has a great sense of humor, responds with a sly look, “No! Monkey mama!” And demonstrates her blue plastic monkey toy for people to admire the real mama. 

20 responses to “Like Me”

  1. David Bellamy Avatar
    David Bellamy

    How do you eat waterelon,then? Good waterelon is one of my very favorite fruits.

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    1. Clarissa Avatar

      I know it’s barbaric but I cut it in half and eat it with a spoon.

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      1. Clarissa Avatar

        Otherwise my ears get too dirty.

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  2. David Bellamy Avatar
    David Bellamy

    I cut it smaller than that and eat watermelon with a spoon, also. Cutting a ten kilo watermelon only in half makes an awfully big serving. Sorry for the earlier misspelling.

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  3. David Bellamy Avatar
    David Bellamy

    Of course, watermelon must be eaten with salt to bring out the flavor

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    1. Clarissa Avatar

      With salt?? Never heard of that. I know people eat pickled watermelon but I never tried.

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      1. David Bellamy Avatar
        David Bellamy

        It must be a regional custom. When I was a child in Northeast Tennessee, everyone I knew put salt on watermelon and also on grapefruit.

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        1. Clarissa Avatar

          Very interesting!

          In my part of the world, we eat watermelon with rye bread.

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  4. el Avatar
    el

    I love cutting watermelons into smaller cubes and eating with a fork. One of my most favorite dishes. 🙂

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  5. DWeird Avatar
    DWeird

    Halfmoon watermelon is the only way to go, if only for the glee of making a mess of yourself in a way that doesn’t make you shunned by society.

    I also don’t quite get biting into a whole tomato – bastards are pretty explosive, and they go better with just a little bit of salt and pepper on the juicy bits anyway.

    Otherwise, yes, I’m in agreement with Klara here. Any fist-sized fruit is meant to go in your fist, not chopped to bits on a plate.

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    1. David Bellamy Avatar
      David Bellamy

      Another of my favorite fruits is avocado. Eating one not at least cut in half seems difficult.

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      1. Clarissa Avatar

        I only put it in salads. Just eating it is too heavy for me.

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    2. David Bellamy Avatar
      David Bellamy

      Half Moon with a spoon, yes!

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      1. Clarissa Avatar

        This thread made me desperate for a watermelon when I only have a honedew melon. Which you definitely have to cut.

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        1. David Bellamy Avatar
          David Bellamy

          I don’t care for honeydew at all. It is difficult for me to believe that some people waste good soil growing honeydew when they could have a wonderful crop of canteloupe or watermelon. (Yes, I know ‘grow’ is an intransitive verb, but once again, common usage is undermining the beauty of English.)

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          1. Clarissa Avatar

            I agree completely with your point about common usage undermining the beauty of the language. Why do you dislike honedew, though?

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            1. David Bellamy Avatar
              David Bellamy

              ‘Dislike’ is too strong a word. Honeydew just seems rather tasteless to me, compared to canteloupe. Maybe too bland is a better way to express it.

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            2. David Bellamy Avatar
              David Bellamy

              ‘Dislike’ is too strong a word. Honeydew just seems rather tasteless to me, compared to canteloupe. Maybe ‘too bland’ is a better way to express it.

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              1. Clarissa Avatar

                You are right. It is a bit bland.

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  6. David Bellamy Avatar
    David Bellamy

    Sorry. WordPress said I had already posted that, but it was not visible. Now it is there twice,with a minor edit.

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A conservative literary critic and college professor