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Female Envy

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Clarissa

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I don’t envy any woman’s looks, career, or money status. I do envy women with more children because my own eldest child died. I don’t envy them in a bad way. I am so happy for them and I wish them the absolute best and even more children if they are able. But I do envy.

I also envy the women who are able to have easier pregnancies. Mine were extremely difficult, and I’d so love to have had the experience of being pregnant and not in hellish pain or needing to see the doctor three times a week.

Compared to this, honestly, what another woman looks like or how much money she makes is nothing to me. Women who can feel that kind of envy are very fortunate because they haven’t suffered real female defeats. Being at war with one’s own body because it just won’t do the one thing you really need it to do is harsh.

30 responses to “Female Envy”

  1. Avatar
    Anonymous

    I do not envy anyone whatsoever, I do not even know what envy feels like. I am surprised and intrigued when I realise some people display this thing called “envy”. I do “hate” though, I hate people who litter public spaces, I hate dog lovers and misogynists. I also never have “anxiety”. One daughter says I’m a bit autistic.

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  2. cliff arroyo Avatar
    cliff arroyo

    “I hate people who litter public spaces”

    So do I…. an unsolicited graffiti “artists” too (including the incredibly overrated ‘Banksy’ or whatever his name is).

    “I hate dog lovers”

    Seems…. a bit disproportionate…. I can understand people not especially liking dogs, but hate for people who do like them…. why?

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    1. Clarissa Avatar
      Clarissa

      I hate the “she’s just playing” dog owner type. Somehow I’m expected to be comforted by this when the nasty thing is laddering my tights and slobbering over my skirt. These people sound cetifiably insane when they say it, smiling moronically while the animal is acting like the stranger in front of it is a human fire hydrant.

      Liked by 1 person

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      1. cliff arroyo Avatar
        cliff arroyo

        “hate the “she’s just playing” dog owner type”

        Yeah, lots of people have no business having dogs since they have no idea how to control them (or how much better that is for them, other people and the dogs themselves).

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      2. Avatar
        Anonymous

        Dogs are just animals, they do not know right from wrong, they are not the authors of their own existence, they are man-made mutants, they have no eco-system. The owners use them as “pets” (objects of replacement and gratification) and do not care that they are an ecological disaster (mainly through the production of pet food whereby other animals are intensively farmed and cruelly killed). They are invasive creatures (pack animals who, in the absence of other dogs, use the humans as “pack”). Most dog owners live increasingly atomised lives around their dogs. I always come across people who pamper their dogs and neglect their children or spend more time, money, parental energy on their dog than on their child. Anthropomorphism (a form of idiocy and decadence) is rife (some Disney brainwashing there) and children who grow up with dogs miss out on proper socialisation and developing communication and conflict handling skills, in the way a dummy used for too long can delay speech and intellectual development. I could literally write 10 000 words on dog idolatry.

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        1. cliff arroyo Avatar
          cliff arroyo

          “they are man-made mutants, they have no eco-system”

          There’s a lot of evidence that humans and dogs have been together for thousands of years (are there records of any human culture without dogs?) and their eco-system, as both a domesticated and domestic species is being around people. Humans and dogs are not the same without each other (and both end up the poorer imo).

          They, like everything else, become the focus of all sorts of mal-adaptive and dysfunctional behaviors in the alienated modern world. But you can say that about anything.

          “children who grow up with dogs miss out on proper socialisation and developing communication and conflict handling skills”

          That’s a very odd idea and doesn’t track with my experience at all.

          Liked by 1 person

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          1. Clarissa Avatar
            Clarissa

            I recently met a very nice, intelligent, and well-behaved dog that I was sorely tempted to steal from its owner. This mellowed me out on dogs to a degree.

            Liked by 1 person

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          2. Avatar
            Anonymous

            …it does with mine. I hear various crap from dog-lovers “it makes children responsible”, really? I have never seen a child pick up after a dog and why not make a child reponsible towards the practice of an instrument, or reading, writing, learning pottery, etc. Children who spend their time with dogs seem weird, they have poor vocabulary and on their way to becoming snowflakes. The whole family’s conversation is centred around the dog with vomit-inducing infantilism and kitsch sentimentality. Children with “furry friends” have less time for reading, playing with other people, trying new things. The parents do not take them to concerts, museums or to visit other people unless they can also take the dog or find a dog sitter (not easy). Dog-ownership is pushed through every channel so it is difficult to resist it or argument against it, I think it is part of the de-population agenda.

            Liked by 1 person

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            1. Clarissa Avatar
              Clarissa

              OK, thank you, I now feel better about not getting my daughter a cat which she really wants.

              I personally want to get her a cat but my husband is adamantly opposed and I defer. Maybe he is right on this.

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              1. Avatar
                Anonymous

                A cat is a good compromise, I did the same. The opportunity cost is far lower and it also got rid of mice and rats. It goes out on its own and you never see it urinate and defecate in the middle of the pavement while looking straight into your eyes.

                Liked by 1 person

              2. Clarissa Avatar
                Clarissa

                That’s the #1 selling point to get a cat that my kid quotes, as well. 😁

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          3. Avatar
            Anonymous

            ….in those thousand of years, dogs were livestock not “babies” , “family members” or partners.

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            1. Clarissa Avatar
              Clarissa

              I was at the cemetery yesterday, and stopped near a bunch of graves with the words “our dearest baby girl” and such. To my horror, I realized that the pictures on the headstones were of dogs. The cheapest headstone at that cemetery is upwards of $7,000, which, sadly, I have reason to know. And not because I buried any dogs.

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              1. Avatar
                Anonymous

                Yes, and dogs totally understand and appreciate this. Dog owners cry for about two hours when their “baby girl” dies (it’s actually a very old dog that cost them a fortune in the last years of its life as these goofs don’t seem aware that dogs have a much shorter life span), then they rush to buy another dog. Their life basically goes from dog to dog. Police dogs are given military honours as if they knew the real purpose of what they did (in fact, all they know is that they got a treat if they got it right) and actually chose to do those tasks. .

                Liked by 1 person

              2. Clarissa Avatar
                Clarissa

                A professor in his late thirties, a burly man, came to the meeting with an emotional support dog.

                I honestly can’t understand this.

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              3. Avatar
                Anonymous

                Same here, once I did not sleep at all for three months.

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              4. Avatar
                Anonymous

                It is bordering on zoophilia, probably has “hugs” and “kisses” and sleeps with his shxt beast.

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            2. oldcowboy3 Avatar
              oldcowboy3

              No, for many thousands of years dogs were partners, guarding, hunting, and carrying. Are there bad dogs and bad owners, certainly and most of the former are created by the latter. The worst are those that purchase inbred small “cute” pests. That said I would probably instinctively distrust a woman that did not instantly melt seeing a Labrador puppy — not that I hace actually ever met such a creature ;-D

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              1. oldcowboy3 Avatar
                oldcowboy3

                have actually ;-D

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              2. Avatar
                Anonymous

                I would distrust a woman who does not melt when she sees a giggling baby.

                Liked by 1 person

              3. oldcowboy3 Avatar
                oldcowboy3

                “I would distrust a woman who does not melt when she sees a giggling baby.”

                Hmmm, well, we can at least agree on that ;-D

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            3. cliff arroyo Avatar
              cliff arroyo

              “dogs were livestock not “babies” , “family members” or partners”

              People who call dogs ‘fur babies’ and the like are insufferable but dogs were very much partners and earned their keep.

              They were beneath people but far above ‘livestock’. Research has shown they are very good at tracking human eye movement which probably comes from hunting. In rough terms, dog outsourced brains to people and people outsourced their sense of smell to dogs.

              And thinking dogs do tasks for people just for food have obviously never spent time around dogs (which have been selectively bred to want to please people for millenia).

              In a modern technologically advanced society they’re a luxury and people can survive easily without them but go outside the sterile city and dogs are still there (and will be for as long as people are around).

              Liked by 2 people

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              1. Clarissa Avatar
                Clarissa

                There were horrible people who got dogs during COVID and then got rid of them when the lockdowns lifted. I despise such people passionately. An animal is not human but it’s a live being. You can’t get rid of it like a broken gadget. Bastards.

                Liked by 1 person

      3. Avatar
        Anonymous

        …she just want to say “hello”, which is an absolutely lie. “She” wants to check if I have any food in my pockets and slobber all over my clothes in the process.

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        1. Clarissa Avatar
          Clarissa

          The owners seem to mean it as a reassurance that the dog won’t bite you. But they can’t know if it will or won’t. It’s an animal. It will do what occurs to it at any time.

          We have a local ice cream man who drives around with an unleashed, unmuzzled pit bull in his ice cream truck. I can’t begin to understand such extreme carelessness.

          Liked by 1 person

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  3. bluebird of bitterness Avatar
    bluebird of bitterness

    I envy people who are able to sleep eight hours every night. I manage it maybe twice a month.

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    1. Clarissa Avatar
      Clarissa

      Is it because of sleep issues or because you are busy?

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      1. bluebird of bitterness Avatar
        bluebird of bitterness

        It’s chronic insomnia of unknown origin.

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        1. Clarissa Avatar
          Clarissa

          I’m so sorry. I’ve had sleep issues my whole life, so I can understand the degree of suffering.

          Liked by 1 person

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  4. cliff arroyo Avatar
    cliff arroyo

    “I despise such people”

    So do I. And the horrible people who produce genetic freaks like modern English bulldogs or German shepherds for clout.

    I don’t get the depth of some people’s hatred of dogs… it seems…. unhealthy.

    I can understand not liking them or not wanting one but hatred is too precious a commodity to waste on dogs.

    I dislike domesticated birds (esp parrots) and would never have one but I don’t rant and rave about how awful people who like them are….

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A conservative literary critic and college professor

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