Female Envy

I don’t envy any woman’s looks, career, or money status. I do envy women with more children because my own eldest child died. I don’t envy them in a bad way. I am so happy for them and I wish them the absolute best and even more children if they are able. But I do envy.

I also envy the women who are able to have easier pregnancies. Mine were extremely difficult, and I’d so love to have had the experience of being pregnant and not in hellish pain or needing to see the doctor three times a week.

Compared to this, honestly, what another woman looks like or how much money she makes is nothing to me. Women who can feel that kind of envy are very fortunate because they haven’t suffered real female defeats. Being at war with one’s own body because it just won’t do the one thing you really need it to do is harsh.

30 thoughts on “Female Envy

  1. I do not envy anyone whatsoever, I do not even know what envy feels like. I am surprised and intrigued when I realise some people display this thing called “envy”. I do “hate” though, I hate people who litter public spaces, I hate dog lovers and misogynists. I also never have “anxiety”. One daughter says I’m a bit autistic.

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  2. “I hate people who litter public spaces”

    So do I…. an unsolicited graffiti “artists” too (including the incredibly overrated ‘Banksy’ or whatever his name is).

    “I hate dog lovers”

    Seems…. a bit disproportionate…. I can understand people not especially liking dogs, but hate for people who do like them…. why?

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    1. I hate the “she’s just playing” dog owner type. Somehow I’m expected to be comforted by this when the nasty thing is laddering my tights and slobbering over my skirt. These people sound cetifiably insane when they say it, smiling moronically while the animal is acting like the stranger in front of it is a human fire hydrant.

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      1. “hate the “she’s just playing” dog owner type”

        Yeah, lots of people have no business having dogs since they have no idea how to control them (or how much better that is for them, other people and the dogs themselves).

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      2. Dogs are just animals, they do not know right from wrong, they are not the authors of their own existence, they are man-made mutants, they have no eco-system. The owners use them as “pets” (objects of replacement and gratification) and do not care that they are an ecological disaster (mainly through the production of pet food whereby other animals are intensively farmed and cruelly killed). They are invasive creatures (pack animals who, in the absence of other dogs, use the humans as “pack”). Most dog owners live increasingly atomised lives around their dogs. I always come across people who pamper their dogs and neglect their children or spend more time, money, parental energy on their dog than on their child. Anthropomorphism (a form of idiocy and decadence) is rife (some Disney brainwashing there) and children who grow up with dogs miss out on proper socialisation and developing communication and conflict handling skills, in the way a dummy used for too long can delay speech and intellectual development. I could literally write 10 000 words on dog idolatry.

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        1. “they are man-made mutants, they have no eco-system”

          There’s a lot of evidence that humans and dogs have been together for thousands of years (are there records of any human culture without dogs?) and their eco-system, as both a domesticated and domestic species is being around people. Humans and dogs are not the same without each other (and both end up the poorer imo).

          They, like everything else, become the focus of all sorts of mal-adaptive and dysfunctional behaviors in the alienated modern world. But you can say that about anything.

          “children who grow up with dogs miss out on proper socialisation and developing communication and conflict handling skills”

          That’s a very odd idea and doesn’t track with my experience at all.

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          1. …it does with mine. I hear various crap from dog-lovers “it makes children responsible”, really? I have never seen a child pick up after a dog and why not make a child reponsible towards the practice of an instrument, or reading, writing, learning pottery, etc. Children who spend their time with dogs seem weird, they have poor vocabulary and on their way to becoming snowflakes. The whole family’s conversation is centred around the dog with vomit-inducing infantilism and kitsch sentimentality. Children with “furry friends” have less time for reading, playing with other people, trying new things. The parents do not take them to concerts, museums or to visit other people unless they can also take the dog or find a dog sitter (not easy). Dog-ownership is pushed through every channel so it is difficult to resist it or argument against it, I think it is part of the de-population agenda.

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            1. OK, thank you, I now feel better about not getting my daughter a cat which she really wants.

              I personally want to get her a cat but my husband is adamantly opposed and I defer. Maybe he is right on this.

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              1. A cat is a good compromise, I did the same. The opportunity cost is far lower and it also got rid of mice and rats. It goes out on its own and you never see it urinate and defecate in the middle of the pavement while looking straight into your eyes.

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          2. ….in those thousand of years, dogs were livestock not “babies” , “family members” or partners.

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            1. I was at the cemetery yesterday, and stopped near a bunch of graves with the words “our dearest baby girl” and such. To my horror, I realized that the pictures on the headstones were of dogs. The cheapest headstone at that cemetery is upwards of $7,000, which, sadly, I have reason to know. And not because I buried any dogs.

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              1. Yes, and dogs totally understand and appreciate this. Dog owners cry for about two hours when their “baby girl” dies (it’s actually a very old dog that cost them a fortune in the last years of its life as these goofs don’t seem aware that dogs have a much shorter life span), then they rush to buy another dog. Their life basically goes from dog to dog. Police dogs are given military honours as if they knew the real purpose of what they did (in fact, all they know is that they got a treat if they got it right) and actually chose to do those tasks. .

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              2. A professor in his late thirties, a burly man, came to the meeting with an emotional support dog.

                I honestly can’t understand this.

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              3. It is bordering on zoophilia, probably has “hugs” and “kisses” and sleeps with his shxt beast.

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            2. No, for many thousands of years dogs were partners, guarding, hunting, and carrying. Are there bad dogs and bad owners, certainly and most of the former are created by the latter. The worst are those that purchase inbred small “cute” pests. That said I would probably instinctively distrust a woman that did not instantly melt seeing a Labrador puppy — not that I hace actually ever met such a creature ;-D

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              1. “I would distrust a woman who does not melt when she sees a giggling baby.”

                Hmmm, well, we can at least agree on that ;-D

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            3. “dogs were livestock not “babies” , “family members” or partners”

              People who call dogs ‘fur babies’ and the like are insufferable but dogs were very much partners and earned their keep.

              They were beneath people but far above ‘livestock’. Research has shown they are very good at tracking human eye movement which probably comes from hunting. In rough terms, dog outsourced brains to people and people outsourced their sense of smell to dogs.

              And thinking dogs do tasks for people just for food have obviously never spent time around dogs (which have been selectively bred to want to please people for millenia).

              In a modern technologically advanced society they’re a luxury and people can survive easily without them but go outside the sterile city and dogs are still there (and will be for as long as people are around).

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              1. There were horrible people who got dogs during COVID and then got rid of them when the lockdowns lifted. I despise such people passionately. An animal is not human but it’s a live being. You can’t get rid of it like a broken gadget. Bastards.

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      3. …she just want to say “hello”, which is an absolutely lie. “She” wants to check if I have any food in my pockets and slobber all over my clothes in the process.

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        1. The owners seem to mean it as a reassurance that the dog won’t bite you. But they can’t know if it will or won’t. It’s an animal. It will do what occurs to it at any time.

          We have a local ice cream man who drives around with an unleashed, unmuzzled pit bull in his ice cream truck. I can’t begin to understand such extreme carelessness.

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  3. “I despise such people”

    So do I. And the horrible people who produce genetic freaks like modern English bulldogs or German shepherds for clout.

    I don’t get the depth of some people’s hatred of dogs… it seems…. unhealthy.

    I can understand not liking them or not wanting one but hatred is too precious a commodity to waste on dogs.

    I dislike domesticated birds (esp parrots) and would never have one but I don’t rant and rave about how awful people who like them are….

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