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Therapist Buzzwords

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Clarissa

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Excellent advice for people who are looking for a therapist:

All these buzzwords are gigantic, pulsating, neon red flags.

15 responses to “Therapist Buzzwords”

  1. Demotrash Avatar
    Demotrash

    I’m naturally repulsed by this language anyway. Without even thinking of therapeutic quality, I wouldn’t want to be in a room for an hour with someone this sentimental and nauseating.

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  2. Avatar
    Anonymous

    I’m genuinely surprised by some of the red flags on this list! Would someone kindly clarify why “trauma-informed,” “parts work,” and “gratitude” should be red flags? I thought therapists could get additional certifications in the discipline of trauma recovery to become trauma-informed, specialize in the Internal Family Systems model to lead parts work, and I know many academics studies across disciplines affirm the importance of gratitude to well-being. I would appreciate further insight here!

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    1. Clarissa Avatar
      Clarissa

      It’s like camomile tea, you know? It’s nice. It can have some calming effect. It’s warm, it’s tasty. But if you have a broken leg or raging diabetes or something even worse, recommending camomile tea sounds like a cruel joke. Gratitude journaling, affirmations – it’s all nice. They solve exactly zero psychological problems. They don’t cure addiction or bipolar. They don’t resolve depression or anxiety. But to supplement a healthy, happy lifestyle, I definitely recommend gratitude practices. If you are already fine, they will enhance your well-being. But for somebody like my husband, who experienced severe physics and emotional abuse as a child, recommending a gratitude ritual sounds like mockery.

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      1. Avatar
        Anonymous

        Thank you – that completely makes sense. Would you put trauma work and certifications in the same fluffy category as gratitude practices?

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        1. Clarissa Avatar
          Clarissa

          The thing is, trauma is kind of meaningless because it’s like treating a broken leg by informing somebody they have a broken leg. Obviously, it’s trauma that causes the mental effects. What else could it be?

          As for certifications, for myself if choose a specialist with zero certifications and 500 hours of personal psychoanalysis with 2 different analysts over one with 20 certifications. My analyst has an MSW and zero certifications. And she’s a bloody animal. I had PTSD with terrible nightmares. Resolved in 2 sessions. She’s this mega pretty, mega elegant lady who sits there like a cute flower and then hits you with one sentence that completely changes your reality. I don’t want to talk about the more serious things I had to get treated but my nightmares are gone. My lifelong sleeping issues are gone. I sleep like I never have since childhood. I do grato now but only after I got treated.

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          1. Avatar
            Anonymous

            My insight from this extremely valuable exchange is that self-awareness and wisdom are the most important qualities in therapists, both of which come from experience more than certifications above standard academic training in the discipline. I associated those additional certifications with additional skill and quality.

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            1. Clarissa Avatar
              Clarissa

              The most important thing is that it should be somebody who isn’t trying to solve their own problems at the expense of a client. Somebody who can understand that the client’s husband has nothing to do with her husband, the client’s mother is not her mother.

              Also, it’s important to be aware of the difference between the neoliberal approach to therapy that seeks solutions on individual’s inner resources. And real therapy that creates solutions through a relationship. CBT, for example, tells you to think differently about your problems, turning you into a closed-circuit system. I hate to keep using the dreaded N word but this is folly neoliberal. And thus doomed.

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          2. Avatar
            Anonymous

            Hmm, you’ve mentioned a male analyst a couple of years ago. Wonder when it’s good to change analysts….

            Congratulations about solving the sleep issues by the way. It’s such an improvement to be able to sleep, eat, etc right.

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            1. Clarissa Avatar
              Clarissa

              Yes, it’s a great idea to switch if you hit a wall and exhaust your progress with one of them. Or if you develop a completely new problem that calls for a different type of person to help.

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              1. Avatar
                Anonymous

                Makes sense. Any tips on choosing a new therapist, btw?

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              2. Clarissa Avatar
                Clarissa

                Who is the parent who caused most of your problems, mom or dad? Choose a therapist of the same sex as the most difficult parent. If both sucked equally, go with your instinct.

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              3. Avatar
                Anonymous

                Tempted to pick a dude, and one who looks like he lifts weights, because (phrase impulsively came to mind) I don’t want to be the biggest pussy in *this* relationship. Which I’m sure he’ll have a field day with.

                Thanks.

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              4. Clarissa Avatar
                Clarissa

                This is the perfect method. I knew it was going to work with the female analyst because she’s a tall, thin, stylish woman, the exact opposite of my mother. 😁😁😁

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      2. Clarissa Avatar
        Clarissa

        Just in time, a good article on the IFS fad: https://www.thecut.com/article/truth-about-ifs-therapy-internal-family-systems-trauma-treatment.html

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  3. v07 Avatar
    v07

    Well, any method can be misused and any method’s practitioner can mess things up, due to either having some agenda or just being unprofessional.

    For me IFS was particularly helpful, much more helpful than all my attempts at something analytical (let’s say I had the same early influences as Clarissa in terms of psychotherapy…). I did not discover any hidden memories. I did not develop “my parts made me do it” attitude or any other ways of shirking personal responsibility. Did not reject my analytical side. But in my case being analytical is one of my main defences… So therapies that play along with that had limited usefulness.

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