Clarissa's Blog

Trump’s childcare plan is a great thing. I don’t understand people who bash the plan just because they detest Trump. It’s wonderful that paid maternity leave and credits for childcare are becoming part of the GOP agenda. Elections come and go but this crucial issue transcends today’s concerns. Even just having a Republican candidate talk about this is a beautiful thing. 

It’s incredible that people can be this stupid:

In Canada, women represent only 21.8% of full professors while constituting 36% of associate professors, 43% of assistant professors, and 60% of university student populations. In contrast, men represent 78% of full professors, although comprising 40% of student enrollment.

It must be clear even to somebody permanently brain-damaged that when these 50, 60 and 70-year-old male full professors enrolled in college men did not comprise 40% of student enrollment. Yet the idiot keeps eagerly comparing apples to hot-air balloons and spawns a mile-long piece that only grows more stupid with every sentence.

Once again N has been going on and on about how hard it was to work at their dacha when he was a kid. This time, the story of hardship included planting, fertilizing and weeding dill.

“Oh, come on!” I exclaimed. “You are so exaggerating. Nobody plants or fertilizes dill. It’s a weed. It grows on its own. It’s not that hard to grow things at all.”

“I’m from Russia,” N said grimly. “Nothing grows. Not even dill.”

And just like that, the whole Russian history suddenly became crystal clear. 

Putin has two obsessions: the US and the Olympics. It’s a Soviet thing, whatever. So it makes perfect sense that the same hackers who hacked the DNC database have now hacked the doping test records of the Olympic Committee. 

This is so pathetic.

I’m not teaching today, so I did the following:

– took Klara for a walk. She is moody today and needs a lot of love.

– took her to Panera for breakfast. My breakfast, obviously. 

– went to the bank to take out $100 in $1 bills. The egg delivery gentleman stopped accepting checks and wants cash every week. It’s easier for me to take out the whole amount until the end of the academic year than worry about making exact change every week.

– shopped for groceries.

– made fish kotlety that are absolutely delicious but that take forever to make with my stupid blender.

– did the laundry.

– made sweet potato puree for Klara. 

– washed and set up a new baby gym for Klara. I’m not wasteful, I get these things for free. 

– prepared activities for tomorrow’s class on gustar + infinitive.

– prepared activities for tomorrow’s class on the expulsion of Jews from Spain.

– answered student emails. 

– set up a meeting for the committee I’m chairing.

– boiled Klara’s bottles. 

– then boiled her dummies and the thingies we use to attach the dummies to her clothes. 

– read my new book on Basque separatists.

– answered an email from my departmental Chair.

– posted on my online course blog.

– prepared fresh water for the formula.

And all this with a cranky baby demanding attention, food, changing, playing, kisses, etc.

And it’s only a quarter to 2.

It’s ok, tomorrow I will be on campus, resting. Because compared to this, teaching is a snooze. 

It’s hard to say what’s dumber, Lochte’s stunt in Rio or the actions of the so-called protesters who rushed the stage to call attention to themselves. Just like Lochte had done.

There is a bizarre procession of people on TV announcing, “We are not deplorable!” I’m beginning to wonder if they understand what the word actually means. 

To deplore means to abhor, to disapprove of strongly. It points to an emotional reaction that can’t be disputed. If somebody deplored something, nobody can tell them they are wrong because the action is not undertaken in the field of right or wrong. If I say “I’m saddened by your actions”, you can’t tell me I’m not, it’s ridiculous. If I say I deplore your behavior, you can’t tell me I don’t. 

It’s especially cute that they argue with a subjective emotional reaction to themselves but not with a statement that they are racists which has the potential of being disproved.

Everybody likes to feel exceptional. I’m reading a collection of articles by Spanish authors who keep exclaiming, “Our government lied to us back in 2004! In what other country is this even possible?!?”

Well, actually, in any country. Hell, I know a place where people were led to believe that 9/11 had something to do with Iraq. And that led to an endless war, compared to which the pathetic little lie of your government blaming the Basques for an Al Qaeda bombing is really small fry. Especially since your government fell a few days after proffering this lie.

Hey, show me a country where a government doesn’t lie, and then we’ll talk about being exceptional. But don’t nominate business as usual for the title of The Most Aggrieved Citizens Ever.

Trump’s new ad reminds me of an old Russian joke that, adjusted for current realities, goes like this: 

A father discovers that his 14-year-old daughter posts ads on Craigslist offering strangers sex in exchange for candy. 

“Masha!” the horrified father exclaims. “How can this be?!? You eat non-organic candy???”

In a similar manner, the ad goes, “She called us racist, sexist and Islamophobic? Well, duh. But deplorable? That was really hurtful.”