Fellow academics,
I need urgent help from you. Remember the worst student you ever had. Then one who made you think, “God, please, not again” whenever you saw his name on the course roll. The one who was completely hopeless in every single class she took with you. Whose dog ate his homework so often that you started suspecting he lived in a kennel. Who, time and again, disturbed your teaching by snoring (seriously, I’m not exaggerating) in the middle of your lecture. Who was so bad that you and your colleagues expressed your condolences to each other whenever she took a course with one of you. The one whose knowledge seemed to diminish with every course he attended. The one who did not participate a single time in any of the class discussions.
Can you see this student in your mind’s eye?
Now imagine that this student asks you for a letter of recommendation to graduate school. What would you respond? If you could give me the actual words you’d use, I’d be very very grateful.
P.S. Imagine also that this student is the nicest person in the world and you really don’t want to hurt their feelings.
Clarissa's Blog 
Dear Student,
Before asking professors to write you a letter of recommendation, it is always a good idea to make an appointment with the professor to gauge whether or not the professor feels comfortable writing a supportive letter.
I, of course, am willing to write you a letter. However, as you are well aware, your performance in my class was never stellar, and I would have to say that in the letter.
If you would like to meet to discuss this further, I’d be happy to.
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Based upon what you have written, I am wondering what the student’s grades are like. If she did not get decent grades in your classes (B or better) then I would say: “I cannot write you a positive recommendation based on your academic performance. An honest letter from me would likely not help you get into graduate school. We can discuss this further if you like, of course, but I doubt it will make any difference.”
I suspect that you probably treated this student better than many of her professors did, and she is looking for someone who “likes” her to write a letter.
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Yes, I tried to be as helpful as I could, spent a lot of time with the student, explained things over and over, but the result was non-existent.
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Why does this student want to go to graduate school?
That’s the question you need to ask.
Graduate school, to state the obvious, is intense. This student has shown no interest in his/her undergraduate courses. This student can’t even be bothered to stay awake during class.
I know you don’t want to be mean, Clarissa, but this student needs a wake-up call. You’d be doing them a favor. This is not the time for diplomacy, this is the time for blunt, uncensored honesty. (You’d also be doing the professors in that graduate program a favor.)
What I’m curious about is, how is this student graduating?
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“What I’m curious about is, how is this student graduating?”
– Retaking the same courses time and again, time and again. Eventually one does manage to squeeze through with a barely passing grade.
“Why does this student want to go to graduate school?”
– That was the student’s plan since day 1 because the job this person wants to have cannot be applied for without an MA.
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It might interesting to ask that student what exactly does s/he expect you to say considering… and roll off the list of non-recommandable things that have an impact on being a graduate student.
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If the student, as suspected, got a bad or mediocre grade in the course, I would say something to the point of “While I enjoyed having you in class very much, I’d suggest you ask for a letter of recommendation to a professor with whom you had better grades. What you need is an academic letter. I couldn’t write you the best possible letter, because of your performance in the class. I know you are an intelligent young man/lady, so I am sure you will not have trouble finding a professor in whose class you excelled”. Something along those lines, minus the grammar mistakes.
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I really like this response. Thank you!!! I can see somebody with a long experience of answering such requests. 🙂
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One other useful thing occurred to me that i learned from Meggin McIntosh. You can say a sentence beginning with “I have a policy…”
In this case you could say: “I have a policy of only writing letters of recommendation for students who get A’s in my class.”
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Oh, that is brilliant. Brilliant, brilliant! “I have a policy” sounds amazing. I have no idea why I never thought of this before because this was the phrase that helped me enormously in managing my personal life. 🙂
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Glad you found it useful. One of the ways it has been most useful for me is the question of independent study. I tell students: “I have a policy of only taking students for independent study when they have already taken a class with me.”
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How about : “I have a policy only to write recommendation letters to graduate school for students who never received a failing grade in any of my courses”?
I think this is a reasonable policy.
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Sounds exceptionally reasonable to me!
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Dear student,
unfortuantely, based on our interactions during my classes that you attended, I do not feel that I can write an objective letter about your performance that would be helpful for your graduate school applications. I would therefore encourage you to instead contact other professors in whose classes you excelled.
Best regards.
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It’s interesting that you say that this student is really nice. Other professors I know find it to be offensive when students sleep in their class, or fail to turn in homework. I’d say someone who has that little respect for academics should probably not go to a grad school program – not in the subject you teach anyway. And if they’re say, a biology major, looking into a science’s graduate degree, maybe they’re better at science classes, but then why would they want a recommendation from a Spanish professor?
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“And if they’re say, a biology major, looking into a science’s graduate degree, maybe they’re better at science classes, but then why would they want a recommendation from a Spanish professor”
– Yes, it’s precisely like that. It is not my field this student wants to do a graduate degree in.
“It’s interesting that you say that this student is really nice. Other professors I know find it to be offensive when students sleep in their class”
– I don’t know, it’s just this is such a nice, inoffensive person that it’s hard to take offense. 🙂
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I faced this situation once. I said somthing along the following lines
“Although I am willing to write you a letter, I suggest you approach someone who is better aquainted with you strengths. Though you [INSERT SOMETHING NICE HERE,] your work in the class was, by and large, average [OR YOU COULD USE A HARSHER WORD}. So I can write you a brief letter and comment on your [ONE GOOD THING] but overall, I don’t think a letter from me will be further your goals.
So that’s what I did and the student backed off. That may be softer than you want. But it should work. Good luck! 🙂
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The cynic in me wonders if this student is just planning to go to grad school so the student grants/loans won’t dry up.
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But if I understand correctly what Clarissa says, there’s no chance a all for this student to access to a grad school.
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Unless it’s just my discipline that the student was so bad at. Is it possible? My discipline was the student’s major.
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“Retaking the same courses time and again, time and again. Eventually one does manage to squeeze through with a barely passing grade.”
So there’s no problem anymore, say NO!
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You are too kind, that’s your problem. With your kindness in mind, Spanish Prof.’s answer is the best option available to you. If your student still wants a letter of rec. from you after reading your answer, then you know how to write a vague or insipid letter of rec., because you are an excellent writer and you are too kind.
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Finally, I feel understood! Everybody sees me as an ogre and fear me but I am, really, a very kind person. Thank you, my friend!
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Too kind. Even kinder than I thought. Ridiculously kind! 😉 (don’t worry, I appreciate it 🙂 )
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“Imagine also that this student is the nicest person in the world and you really don’t want to hurt their feelings.”
“Retaking the same courses time and again, time and again. Eventually one does manage to squeeze through with a barely passing grade.”
Sorry, but this student is raving lunatic fucktard to ask you this.
Say simply NO to this fucktard and keep your nice formulas for someone else.
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“Sorry, but this student is raving lunatic fucktard to ask you this.
Say simply NO to this fucktard and keep your nice formulas for someone else.”
– David, how can one not adore you? 🙂
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Are you sarcastic?
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No, I’m absolutely serious! I adore your directness, honesty, and passion. These are very endearing qualities.
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mmmmmmm… 🙂
Thank you, if only Quebec ladies would appreciate that…
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“Unless it’s just my discipline that the student was so bad at. Is it possible? My discipline was the student’s major.”
It would be surprising, but anyway, this student is an asshole to ask you this in his own context. Maybe another teacher could do this, but not you. This student is too bad.
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Spanish Prof has a good answer (and maybe that’s what this student should really do), but I think this is too kind for your situation.
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Just say that you like him/her personally, but don’t think he/she would do well in grad school.
One of my favorite professors recently told me she doesn’t think I should apply to grad school. I was upset by this, and I’m not even sure I’m going to give up on grad school, but I also see where she is coming from and appreciate her honesty. I prefer it when people tell me what they think and don’t beat around the bush.
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Dear X: One of the most demanding responsbilities of a concerned professor is to ensure that she does not encourage any student to pursue degree programs or job opportunities that appear to be beyonf their grasp. Unfortunately your record in my class(es) suggests that you are not ready to particpate in graduate studies at this stage in your educational career. Of course, other instructors may have formed a much more favorable judgment on your academic potential. If so, please ask them to provide references for you. I cannot write a favorable reference for you for graduate school and I choose never to write unfavorable references.
With best wishes for your future
Clarissa
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Dear Student,
It’s nice to hear from you, and I am glad you are making plans for your future after graduation. I’m sorry to disappoint you, but I will not recommend you for graduate school. You received a grade of X in my class, and you would be better served by having recommendations from the professors from whom you received an A. Graduate school admission is extremely competitive, and applicants without the strongest credentials are not accepted. Good luck with your future plans.
Sincerely,
Professor Clarissa
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Dear Student:
I am sorry to see that your undergraduate studies were wasted on you and am surprised at how delusional you are. You are lazy, irresponsible and have an excuse for everything. Nonetheless you expect those around you to cheer you on and encourage your endeavours, no matter how unrealistic. Did you maybe get too used to hearing ‘good job’ and ‘nice try’ while growing up? Well, allow me to let you in on something. As an adult, you only get a ‘good job!’ (ie: recommendation letter from a Professor) when you actually do a good job.
Sincerely yours,
Professor Clarissa (who sometimes got turned down for recommendation letters despite being a straight A student every single year and winning a thousand awards through every degree).
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I totally know that this is exactly what you would have written. 🙂 Which is precisely why you don’t have high blood pressure and I do. 🙂
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I’m a little late to the party and definitely not an academic of this standing yet, but I do have a little story to tell. When I was a 2nd year undergrad, I TA’d for a class which required junior standing or higher to take. I was easily the youngest person in the room (though none of the students knew it). I had one student who rarely showed up for section, NEVER turned in his homework, rarely participated, and failed both the midterm and the final. After the class, he sent me, his undergraduate TA (mind he did know I was an undergrad), a request for a recommendation letter, because he was transferring to an ivy league school. I was lucky enough to be able to get away with:
“Dear X,
Unfortunately, I am an undergraduate student, just like you. Regardless of how you did in the class I was your TA for, a letter coming from me would be as meaningless as if your best friend wrote it. I would recommend asking some professors from classes you excelled in. Good luck with your transfer,
Sincerely,
E”
However, I think that in the future, when I am a real professor, I will probably take the “I have a policy of only writing letters for students who got A’s (or B’s) in my class.” approach. It’s cut and dry, and easy to go with. Plus while exceptions can be made, its really not that likely I’d be able to write a good letter for someone who got a C in my class. (this is, of course, not counting independent study/research students)
Not on the rec letter side, I once was a TA for a lab class which a student missed the first 2 weeks of because she had to have surgery to fix her boob job (I kid you not), and then when she DID show up, she demanded to not only have make-up lab sessions (which I scheduled with her, and she didn’t show up to), but she also demanded that she take the midterms at a different time than everyone else because she kept scheduling doctors appointments during lab class, and she felt that it was necessary for me to take an additional 6+ hours out of my week to sit with her while she took exams and did make-up labs that she rarely showed up to. Eventually the professor suggested to her that she drop the class… But seriously, that was one of the weirdest experiences ever. Luckily I never got a rec letter request from her.
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Echoing some of the other comments, I would say something like, “I’m sorry, but I don’t feel like I’m the best person to write you a letter of recommendation. I would suggest that you ask a professor who’s better-acquainted with your skills and strengths.”
I mean, they’re not going to ask you for clarification after that…
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