Busy is a person who is so dedicated to his or her professional or social realization that s/he doesn’t have a whole lot of energy left to invest into dating or romantic life. If Busy is beautiful and has many admirers, s/he chooses a partner early in life and never looks at anybody again. If Busy is less beautiful and popular, s/he might go happily dateless until quite late in life and not even notice it. Then s/he will grab the first person who comes along and will never look at anybody again.
Busy will accept quite a lot of negative traits in the partner, as long as s/he doesn’t interfere too much with what really matters to Busy (career, making money, working in politics, getting published, etc.) But if the partner’s faults begin to detract from Busy’s professional and social interests, Busy will shed him/her easily and happily move along.
Clarissa's Blog 
I don’t have the kind of experience to speak on the issue with such certitude. I tend to believe that falling truly in love happens. Maybe is a rare event ( in terms of quality and intensity). But it does happen. And when it occurs, even the most profoundly professionally-driven person, gets shaped by the colours of love. The problem might arise if the experience is asymmetrical and one of the two will eventually realize that the occurrence was a gift but one destined to be of transient nature.
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What I haven’t understood about this is having to choose a partner. The way I was raised, it was of course required since the expectation was that a woman would not be allowed (by employers) to work at a job that made enough money to support her, allow her to save for her old age, etc., so marriage was necessary.
Other than that I never understood why one should choose a partner, possibly the first that comes along, just to have one; more recently I started to see the advantages given what the structure of society is, what the economy is like, and so on. But … ?
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Advantage 1 is that you always have easily accessible sex without having to look for it. Household chores and bills are split, which leaves more time and energy for what really matters.
I mean, from the point of view of this type of person to which I obviously do not belong.
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Yes, these are advantages and then there are others — it protects you better from your family of origin, and you get treated better at work, etc. Conformity has its rewards!!!
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Yes this sounds very familiar, from a particular guy that I was seeing for awhile (funnily enough he was trying to get published!) You could use all these ‘positive’ words to describe him, such as ‘driven’ or ‘ambitious’ or ‘focused’, but all I could see was somebody who was too scared to just be … without being so busy all the time. And yes, he did shed me quite happily, because easily accessible sex wasn’t worth the price of having to engage emotionally with another human being, outside of all the being busy.
I don’t agree with Kelly, I don’t think all people love in the same way – for him, he was unable to feel in love because most intimacy deemed as ‘normal’ by other people made him feel unbusy and hence uncomfortable. It was a vicious cycle: he was terrified of being unbusy so never let anyone close, so never fell in love. I doubt he would ever have that ‘out of the blue’ feeling of ‘falling in love’.
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“And yes, he did shed me quite happily, because easily accessible sex wasn’t worth the price of having to engage emotionally with another human being, outside of all the being busy.”
– This is very sad. But more for him than for you. You can get rid of this guy and be happy, while he will be stuck with his sad way of being for a long time.
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Hey, yes, thank you = )
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“… what really matters.”
So, they are getting a bill and chore-splitter, and a sex and security provider, and don’t really care that much who it is … ? That would explain the divorce rate, I guess, but hmmm…
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