God’s Body Parts

Published by

Clarissa

November 27, 2012

The ABC series “666 Park Avenue,” which is known for its controversial title and satanic content, will not be renewed. Glory to God! The network will air all 13 episodes, but the demonic series will not return next season. Praise the Lord! God is using One Million Moms to help remove this filth from television. As the hands and feet for the Lord, we are making a real difference.

After reading this statement, I can’t get rid of the following question: If the Lord needs people to act as his hands and feet, does he also require somebody to act as his penis and testicles? If so, then who might be playing that worthy role? And if not, how come he gets to have some body parts but not others?

Just wondering.

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23 responses to “God’s Body Parts”

JE

November 27, 2012

Now that you mention it these “one millio moms” people do sound like dicks

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the twisted spinster

November 27, 2012

I have no respect for people who use “Moms” instead of “Mothers” in formal usage.

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1. bloggerclarissa
  
  November 27, 2012
  
  I agree completely. One is a Mom to her child but not to everybody else.
  
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thevenerablecorvex

November 27, 2012

“If the Lord needs people to act as his hands and feet, does he also require somebody to act as his penis and testicles? If so, then who might be playing that worthy role?”

I’m tempted to say “ask Mary,” but that would be blasphemous.

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1. bloggerclarissa
  
  November 27, 2012
  
  Nothing better than a small touch of blasphemy to get one through the day. 🙂
  
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  1. Daran
    
    November 27, 2012
    
    I’m strangely reminded of that comment by Amanda Marcotte that got her in such hot water when she was the official blogger to the John Edwards Presidential campaign. It was something about God filling Mary with his hot white sticky Holy Spirit.
    
    As Kenneth Williams once said: “Blasphemy! Blasphemy! They’ve all got it Blas…”. Oh no, that was “infamy“.
    
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Titfortat

November 27, 2012

Well, Virgin birth got rid of the need for a penis. 😉

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1. bloggerclarissa
  
  November 27, 2012
  
  Yes, I keep forgetting that weird part of the weird story. 🙂
  
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H.D.

November 27, 2012

I think it’s cute these people believe a TV show got cancelled because of their or God’s doings…

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1. bloggerclarissa
  
  November 27, 2012
  
  There is a healthy self-esteem and then there is mania grandiosa. 🙂
  
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valter07

November 27, 2012

What about God’s brain?

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1. bloggerclarissa
  
  November 27, 2012
  
  Are you suggesting that I’m a dirty-minded person who can only think about penises and doesn’t care about the intellect or am I reading too much into this question? 🙂 🙂
  
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  1. valter07
    
    November 27, 2012
    
    You are reading not too much, but not what I intended. This was part an allusion to “I am not a member of the [Communist] party, I am it’s brain” joke and part a dig at those who call themselves God’s body parts. If humans are God’s body parts, then why limit ourselves to arms, legs or even testicles? Someone has to be God’s brain!
    
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    1. bloggerclarissa
      
      November 27, 2012
      
      I never heard the joke before which is why I didn’t get the comment. Funny joke. 🙂 🙂
      
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  2. n8chz
    
    November 27, 2012
    
    I take it, valter07, that isn’t a randomly-assigned avatar?
    
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  3. valter07
    
    November 28, 2012
    
    in fact it is randomly assigned 🙂 As far as I know. But maybe Clarissa tinkered with it…
    
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    1. bloggerclarissa
      
      November 28, 2012
      
      I can see that everybody is getting paranoid as the end of the semester approaches. 🙂
      
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n8chz

November 27, 2012

Don’t know what’s at 666 Park, but 666 Fifth Ave. used to be the address of Bantam Books, which published the paperback editions of Hal Lindsey’s infamous Planet Earth trilogy. I laughed my ass off when I first noticed it.

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David Bellamy

November 27, 2012

I have sometimes wondered whether people say that “God is working through them” to accomplish this or that as a way of dodging, or downright avoiding, at least in their own minds, responsibility for their own actions. [God did it, I didn’t!]

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1. bloggerclarissa
  
  November 27, 2012
  
  I think you are absolutely right, David. “It isn’t me bombing Iraq for absolutely no reason whatsoever. God told me to do it, and who am I to question God’s will?”
  
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2. lamestllama
  
  November 27, 2012
  
  If you accept there is no God without a verifiable method for proving his existence then it is not so much of a leap to believe those that profess to have him acting through them.
  
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  1. bloggerclarissa
    
    November 27, 2012
    
    “If you accept there is no God without a verifiable method for proving his existence then it is not so much of a leap to believe those that profess to have him acting through them.”
    
    – I accept that you exist without any verifiable method of proving your existence but I don’t believe you are acting through me. 🙂
    
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Titfortat

November 27, 2012

Well technically there are God moments……..Oh god, Oh god, dont stop, right there…… 🙂
So is that god working through me or something like that? 😉

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