What would you think about a professor who specializes in the French literature of the 1920s and 1930s but never read a line by Balzac and has a very vague idea of who he is?
What would you think about a professor who specializes in the Russian modernist poetry but never read a line by Tolstoy and says things like, “Could you tell me what the deal on that Tolstoy fellow is? What did he write about?”?
What would you think about a professor who specializes in James Joyce but never read a line by Dickens or Hardy?
I know somebody like that in my field. This person is a Peninsularist who has never read anything by Galdós and is not sure how to pronounce his name.
That isn’t what I find really curious, though. I also don’t find it surprising that this person was given a very prestigious job fresh out of grad school on the strength of very poor Spanish and zero publications. Neither am I shocked that this person – who still hasn’t published a word anywhere on this planet – is about to get tenure at a very good school. (I know who this person’s Daddy is, so nothing surprises me.)
What I do find incomprehensible is how this individual – who is very very limited intellectually, is not well-read, is not doing any interesting research, is hated by students for teaching in a boring and uninspired way – has managed to convince absolutely everybody in sight that s/he is a rising star of contemporary Hispanism.
“Oh, so you know JJ, right?” people keep asking me. “JJ is such a star! The future of our field belongs to JJ. There is just no competing with somebody so brilliant. I only wish I were as good at research as JJ.”
It seems like wherever I go, I encounter a bunch of folks ready to gush about the Zero-Publications JJ. Of course, JJ keeps announcing that something super impressive is about to be published but 5,5 years after getting a PhD, you either have a record of publications or you don’t.
“Ah, you just wait and see!” somebody told me the other day. “JJ is writing this really break-through piece right now. You might want to hold off on submitting your article on the same writer. It might be of real help to you to see what JJ has to say about him.” The word “JJ” was pronounced with the veneration one normally reserves for luminaries who have had a huge impact on the field.
Of course, I;m not holding off on submitting my article because I do want it to appear in print before the end of this millenium.
I find it fascinating how people manage to create a certain image of themselves and then get everybody to believe it. I have no doubt that JJ’s admirers are being completely sincere. I just can’t figure out what drives them to stick to this vision of JJ, all evidence that JJ is a flake notwithstanding.
Clarissa's Blog 
The same thing happens in politics. Think JFK and his rich (through bootlegging) Daddy! Low-brained JFK messed up almost everything that he touched. But Daddy’s (and the Mob’s) money ensured that he remained the darling of the people.
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I really like this analogy. JFK’s appeal is as incomprehensible to me as JJ’s. It’s a mystery what people find in this slimy character.
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I would suggest he is a charismatic figure, but if his classes are so boring, maybe he isn’t. Some people are just good at projecting the right image of themselves and have zero moral integrity. The idea of credibility is meaningless to them.
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My sidewalk diagnosis: Academia-based sociopath!
They can be charming and charismatic when it serves their interest (as in building up a repuation out of nothing among peers and supreriors) but students can’t help them get ahead and so they make no effort (confident in their ability to explain away any poor evaluations that might result).
I think that learning how to present oneself in the best possible way among academic peers is a necessary skill (along with research/publication/teaching). It’s kind of sad that that’s the case but there’s nothing to won in fighting it.
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Yes, JJ’s entire mission in life is brown-nosing all day and every day.
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JJ, if it is the person I am thinking about (very presitigous SLAC in the northeast, perhaps?), published a book some years ago. At any rate, we would all dream of having JJ’s job.
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SLAC world does create its own certain inflated heroes, though. It is a truly strange universe.
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No, my idiot is even more idiotic than the one you mean and never published a word.
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Mais c’est qui donc?
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It would be immoral to name this person until I find an opportunity to say all this to their face.
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You could at least tell me and z back channel? Otherwise it’s cruel.
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I promise to tell you the entire story in person. 🙂 🙂
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Who is it?
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Que síiiii — who is it? where are they?
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Welcome to capitalo-statism!
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Charles Rowley’s comment remidned me: you never revealed your favorite and least favorite president nor have you revealed your favorite and least favorite English/Spanish novels. I want to know the answers! 🙂
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Here is the answer about the presidents:
And the answers about the novels haven’t been published, you are right! I will place them in the next post. Thank you for reminding me.
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Oh yes. I remember now. I even replied! 😉 Ha ha. Did you ever comment on the presidents you liked? Or maybe that wasn’t even a question. Obviously, you can’t trust my memory. 😉
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I can’t trust mine either because I don’t remember. 🙂 🙂 I need to look it up.
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Seriously, wait until your tenure to name it.
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Oh… then who are you talking about? I know that you wrote once that you do not like academic gosspis… but I love them.
JJ can be so many people I know…
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“JJ can be so many people I know…”
– This is the saddest part. We will gossip together, for sure. 🙂
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The corresponding question should be “What do you think of academic departments that allow their graduate students to remain ignorant of large segments of their field?” Isn’t there a pre-thesis examination, written and oral, covering the basics of the field?
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… but person is at a place that hired him, so it’s OK by them …
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Their program is about to stop existing, and that seems perfectly fine by them, too. I think these folks have reached the perfect Zen state. 🙂 Whatever happens, everybody is blissfully happy. 🙂 🙂
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Although there is poetic justice. I have already seen a couple of departments that started placing “sons and daughters” in TT positions get closed down. Let’s hope they all just die out. The departments, I mean.
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I hope this is a rhetorical question. There are few things I hate as much as this disgusting, vile nepotism when rich people buy places in academia for their stupid off-spring and everybody just stands by, gaping.
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So then it isn’t a strong / prestigious program, if it is that precarious.
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Turning a strong / prestigious program to dust and ashes takes approximately 10 years, which is not a lot of time. Even a big program can only absorb a couple of spouses / children / lovers, etc. When their number gets to 5 or 6, you are done for.
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I am still not convinced it will be all that wonderful.
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Maybe people will look at the results and learn the lesson. The only alternative to this is that private universities will lose all scholarly departments and turn into huge business / law schools. And only state universities where this kind of nepotism is impossible to sneak by everybody will have actual scholarship.
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These private schools are really pernicious and people do not understand this well enough yet.
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