How Bankers Save Money

There is this hilarious list of tips for saving money from jobless bankers. Do check it out, it’s the best. Like this suggestion:

12. Have all your medical problems sorted out before you lose your job.

Of course, the bankers who still have jobs will read this and fire people in an even more unexpected manner to prevent them from following this advice.

And the one I especially liked is:

16. Ensure both adults are working

Putting your spouse to work may not save money, but it will at least bring more money in. The male bankers we spoke to were hesitant about insisting their wives got jobs (“There aren’t any out there,” said one). But wives themselves were more open to the idea.

Actually, it will save a ton of money currently spent on anti-depressants, useless parties, and clothes nobody ever wears. So good luck, bankers! You finally get a chance to live a full life, what’s with the chance to get healthy, learn to cook, connect with your kids, and even iron.

19 thoughts on “How Bankers Save Money

        1. After a decade of housewifery, people self-infantilize to such a degree that they cannot make any decisions. This is one of those cases where very decisive intervention is needed to get them out of the house.

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        1. The tone is simply realistic. It would be even more realistic to say “kick the spouse out of the house and bar the door until they get a job.”

          Even after 3 years out of work, housewives become unemployable. Somebody literally needs to put them to work and force them to stay there.

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    1. If you think anybody forces them into housewifery, you are HUGELY mistaken. They bully, threaten, manipulate and go to extremes – all to avoid working. These are no victims. They are victimizers.

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  1. “I know some very sad cases where men are literally bullied into the grave by shopping-obsessed lazy princesses. ”

    Do you have examples of this. This is non-existent here in Québec, and even in Western Europe.

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    1. “I know some very sad cases where men are literally bullied into the grave by shopping-obsessed lazy princesses. ”

      To be more precise, I know some shopping-obsessed princesses who prefer rich men, but bullying men to not work herselves is (almost) non-existent here, and even Western Europe.

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      1. The cases I know are all located in Montreal. And the men in those marriages are not rich at all. Just poor working stiffs who have to work day and night to pay all the bills. And then they have to hear how they are not manly enough because they don’t bring in enough money. One of such women was a friend of mine, and the friendship ended because I couldn’t look at this abuse any longer.

        So let’s not idealize North American society in this respect.

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      2. “Just poor working stiffs who have to work day and night to pay all the bills. And then they have to hear how they are not manly enough because they don’t bring in enough money.”

        I know such kind of shit. I know that some women want their husband to be rich and to work more, but “bullying husband so she would not work”? Really?

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  2. I saw that yesterday. It reads like satire, except that there is no clear indication that it is satire, the author doesn’t appear to be a humor writer and it appears in non-satirical blog. I’m still not entirely sure that she is serious.

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    1. I think this is serious. The suggestion to get rid of the second home sounded earnest enough. 🙂

      People have no idea how funny their reality looks to outsiders. I remember when back in Ukraine we read this article at my university about the British people recycling. Everybody was peeing themselves with laughter because the idea seemed so hilarious.

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