And the Prize Goes To. . .

~ Clarissa

A student is complaining that I’m persecuting her and that I must have something personal against her. She feels so persecuted by me because I gave her an A.

Seriously, I gave this person an A and she can’t get over it. And you know why? Because the grade wasn’t accompanied by

any praise on the importance of my achievement. Would it have been so hard for you to acknowledge how hard I worked on this?

I’ve seen all kinds of weirdos but this is just the limit.

Let’s now place bets on how many people will be willing to hire this individual.

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Published by Clarissa

21 thoughts on “And the Prize Goes To. . .”

  1. Posts like these make me have to remind myself that you are not, in fact, teaching kindergarden. I’m trying and failing to understand the sort of mentality that leads a person over the age of 5 to succeed at something and then complain they didn’t get (irrelevant in the long run) praise for it.

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    1. I often have to remind myself of this, too. This person will be graduating this year.

      I want people to look at the enormous disservice they do to their children by infantilizing them to this degree. The rest of the world then perceives these grown children as freaks because their behavior is simply not normal. How is that a positive outcome for them?

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  2. “any praise on the importance of my achievement. Would it have been so hard for you to acknowledge how hard I worked on this?”

    Did she really write this to you? Jeez…

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      1. I don’t understand why she’d need “praise”. Surely there’s enough gratifications in knowing you succeeded at something you worked very hard at.

        Hmm, just realised the final part of that last sentence would’ve been more naturally written in American English as “knowing you worked hard and succeeded”. That might start explaining things – the A is the result of accomplishing the goal Clarissa set, but “working hard” is a goal in itself and it should also receive recognition, and the student is feeling cheated of that recognition.

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  3. Teacher: I give you an A.

    Student: You have something against meeeee, because you didn’t express
    any praise on the importance of my achievement. Would it have been so hard for you to acknowledge how hard I worked on this?

    Teacher: Sorry, you’re right. I change my mind. I’ll give you a B but I will express my great feelings about you in the next email.

    Student: JUST KEEP MY A, PLEASE!

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  5. Corrected:

    Teacher: You get an A.

    Student: You have something against meeeee, because you didn’t express
    any praise on the importance of my achievement. Would it have been so hard for you to acknowledge how hard I worked on this?

    Teacher: Sorry, you’re right. I change my mind. I’ll give you a B but I will express my great feelings about you in the next email.

    Student: JUST KEEP MY A, PLEASE!

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  6. The importance of her achievement?

    Did she write the first English translation of some great work of Spanish literature that has somehow not already been translated?

    (I’m 28. That makes me part of the generation you older folks are always complaining about, the ones who were raised to believe they were God Emperors of the Universe and that every single thing they do is a momentous achievement. I have never met any member of my generation who is really like this, so I tend to suspect that no such people exist. These posts of yours tell me I am wrong about that, and it really blows my mind.)

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  7. I sent this email to my best student last semester.

    Dear X,

    I want to congratulate you personally for your excellent result in Microeconomics. You get an A+ and you’re the only one to have this grade in my class. You made an excellent work during all of the semester.

    I wish you a great succes in the remainder of your studies.

    David

    (so there’s no praise here about how hard she worked)

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  8. Yes, “good” students fall a lot for this thing. Most of them are good because they were so told at home: follow the rules and you’ll succeed. You’re a good boy/girl. They haven’t been yet born: broken the rules and rebuilt the rules themselves. It’s amazing how far in life you can go without doing this.

    I used to be one of them. Not at school but in other domains like social relationships: After an emotional Exchange I always expected the other to acknowledge it, to clarify, or accept an apology. It used to break me not knowing what had happened or where the other stood: I could take a rejection, hate, anything but silence.

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    1. “They haven’t been yet born: broken the rules and rebuilt the rules themselves.”

      – Absolutely. It is like the entire adolescence, with its teenage experimentation, rebellion, transgression, construction of their individual identities, was amputated from them. As a result, I see tantrum-prone 5-year-olds in adult bodies. It is a very freaky sight to see.

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  9. Maybe it’s extremely awkward portfolio building? She’s angry you didn’t write words of praise because then she can’t use those words as a quote for her next internship/job search?

    Although I can’t imagine whining like this if I want a favor. Then again I sucked at cultivating professors, even the ones I got As from. I don’t even recall whining in print about grades to teachers in high school!

    I did ask a professor once what I would have needed to have done for a paper to have gotten an A because I wanted to use the paper in a portfolio [the portfolio was required of the program and it was a writing class and there wasn’t any comments on the margin, just a grade.] The professor responded by reading the paper again, and regrading it with a higher grade — which ironically wasn’t what I was aiming for.

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