Pregnancy Update

In the meanwhile, I’m about to provoke a small demographic crisis of my own because people lose all desire to procreate when they hear about the travails of my pregnancy.

I could be taken to schools as a contraceptive measure because PUPPPS makes my arms and legs look like I’m in the last stages of the bubonic plague. If that doesn’t scare teenagers into using contraception, nothing will.

Of course, physiologically it would be easier to go through this pregnancy if I were younger. I’d still get gestational hypertension and PUPPPS but I don’t believe I’d get gestational diabetes. Psychologically and emotionally, however, it really helps to be an older person. At 27, I’d be hanging from a chandelier with all this stress and making everybody curse they day I was born. But since I’m so much older and psychologically healthier, I am completely calm and even very funny.

One thought on “Pregnancy Update

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