Did you know there is an app that puts you in touch with random strangers who want to cuddle?
I’m very glad I’m not on the dating market any longer because if I were and people started revealing that they’d used such a service, I would be too creeped out to consider seeing them again. This is similar to how I feel about people who have used the services of sex workers. Not that the activities are similar but they betray a mentality that is so alien to mine that I wouldn’t be able to be around them.
Clarissa's Blog 
“Take this survey to find who you are”
“Our experts will find you the match you deserve”
“Click to cuddle”
Isn’t this form of immediacy more revealing of a more pernicious form of narcissism, in which the consumer of Internet now-ness expects that to translate to an immediate satisfaction of every need, regardless of any other factors?
Well, I’m sorry, but even my pot noodle takes three minutes to cook. 🙂
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If only narcissists turned to the Internet to have their needs solved. But no, they will devour actual people while their victims will stay online until 4 am, trying to work out the traumas narcissists caused them.
Sorry, all of my (quite limited) sense of humor evaporates completely whenever I hear the word “narcissist.”
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So I’ve finally pieced together my whole life story, at least in a manner that now makes sense to me, and I think it is apparent that narcissists are people who are hungry but can never be satisfied and therefore attack others, whereas a shaman takes what the narcissists throw at her and use it to destroy the aspects of the self that made her susceptible to narcissistic attacks in the first place. The shaman regenerates and resolves issues, both in the physical/behavioral sense and through coming to terms with reality on deeper and deeper levels. But narcissists — perhaps through no fault of their own, or perhaps very much so — can be given many things but they can’t seem to digest them or benefit from them, so they always want more and more and more. That is why one has to learn very carefully, especially in terms of responding to criticism. I take it as the height of naivety to bend in response to ongoing criticism, because the narcissist can never be satiated. First he criticises your writing and demeanor, but ultimately he has you bringing hamburgers to his own with free delivery, and he will still find something wrong with those burgers. They are never going to be cooked just right.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XIad3fyqcDg
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What made me susceptible to narcissistic attacks is that the narcissist in my life is my mother.
“I take it as the height of naivety to bend in response to ongoing criticism, because the narcissist can never be satiated.”
– Exactly.
“First he criticises your writing and demeanor, but ultimately he has you bringing hamburgers to his own with free delivery, and he will still find something wrong with those burgers. ”
– Once, my mother yelled at me for 4 hours for not giving her a reason to yell at me. Her complaint was that she comes home tired and wants to vent by yelling at me for something but I couldn’t even give her a reason to yell. So she yelled about that. All of this was delivered completely openly and unashamedly.
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It sounds like you did not express sufficient vulnerability to appease the narcissist. That can be a problem. If you seem to have a wall around you, whether that is a defensive wall or a wall of peace or a wall of joy, they try to blow holes in it.
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Very true. My mother always complained that I didn’t even cry when she yelled at me. “Are you even human?” she’d vociferate. “Any normal human being would cry when her mother tells her that she curses her existence!”
The problem is that any appeasement of a narcissist will be only temporary. And after a short lull, the narcissist’s rage will come back even stronger.
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What they hate more than ever is the sense that you are not suffering. Unless the blood is coming out, they cannot feed.
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