Whenever I hang out with people, I always hear things like, “If only I had your potential / talent / publication record / capacity for research, etc., I would be doing XYZ.”
I appreciate the compliment part but dislike the criticism it introduces. I don’t want “a more exciting life.” I’ve had enough upheaval to last me 5 lifetimes. All I want right now is to be left in peace with my research.
“When you were being shot at, wasn’t that exciting?”
I only had one thing to say to that …
“EXCITING? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!”
Sane people don’t like getting shot at with real bullets, and sane people also prefer not to have to weather through major upheavals if they can possibly avoid them.
[points out that even War Nerd does not say, “Oh, look, I’m getting shot at again, isn’t this bleedin’ awesome …”] 🙂
Yes. People don’t understand the underhanded compliment. It’s really insulting.
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A conservative literary critic and college professor
Clarissa's Blog 
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