N and I haven’t been able to get much sleep for 3 nights because we discovered this YouTube channel – and yes, we know we are too old for this shit but we can’t help ourselves – created by a Russian fellow in his sixties who emigrated to Canada in the same year that I did and is publishing videos to help prospective immigrants decide if they should go to Canada.
We are now hopelessly addicted to these videos because the Russian fellow is so positive, happy, kind and tolerant that it is beyond bizarre to hear him speak Russian. We have never seen a Russian-speaker who is not mentally deficient have such a sunny personality without a shade of cynicism or anger. Moreover, we have never seen a Russian-speaking immigrant who is so honestly excited about the new country yet not hateful towards the old country. And the guy is not fake. He actually seems to be sincerely happy and at peace with the world.
N and I watch this unicorn for hours, imagining what it would be like if all Russians were like this fellow.
Clarissa's Blog 
“the Russian fellow is so positive, happy, kind and tolerant that it is beyond bizarre to hear him speak Russian”
Link or it didn’t happen.
I’ll mention now the bit of Russian body language that always freaks me out. I call it the Russian zombie stare, it’s when you’re trying to talk to a Russian speaker and they stare at you without blinking or moving or displaying any emotion whatsoever (and have nothing to say in return they just keep staring as if you hadn’t said anything or asked any question). What is up with that?
LikeLike
“I call it the Russian zombie stare, it’s when you’re trying to talk to a Russian speaker and they stare at you without blinking or moving or displaying any emotion whatsoever (and have nothing to say in return they just keep staring as if you hadn’t said anything or asked any question).”
This is just one of many: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lugg0iqbYdI
LikeLike
Never mind Russians… I’m stunned to find a CANADIAN not whining passive-aggressively about some minor thing that they’re “horrified about” out there in the world, and demanding a government benefit for anything that moves.
LikeLike
“I’m stunned to find a CANADIAN not whining passive-aggressively about some minor thing that they’re “horrified about” out there in the world”
LikeLike
It’s been theorized that having so much personal space makes one lonely, therefore the “virtue signalling” circuit kicks into high.
LikeLike
Might be true but Russian speakers get no personal space and it didn’t make us any nicer. 🙂
LikeLike
I love this guy! And I want to get to Canada!… 🙂
But even more interesting – that you find him so unusual…
LikeLike
Have you met anybody like this? Because I never did. People like that just don’t speak Russian.
He’s like a free psychotherapist. 🙂 “Everything is good, everything is really good. . .”
LikeLike
Well, you have to select people with whom you associate… But isn’t that always true, with Russians or non-Russians?
Statistically I agree – the Russians are more angry lot than North Americans of the same socioeconomic class and background. But all distributions that apply to people have tails. Especially if one looks among those post-FSU people who spent 15 years here…
LikeLike
My high selectivity is why the only Russian speaker I associate with without being related to them is you. :-))))))
The rest are just scary.
LikeLike
I am flattered. Thank you. But the case of our relationship 🙂 is highly unusual. We knew each other online in the setting of a feminist/psychological forum for a long time before we actually met. So there was a high degree of … forgive me if I overstep it here – psychological intimacy involved. As in – knowing each other, including each other’s personal issues…
And on top of that – I am pretty sure that, just like you, I appear mellower in real life than online. 🙂
LikeLike
Points well taken but I still insist that you have processed your Immigrations better than other Russian speaking immigrants I’ve seen. I have a feeling that people who emigrate without meaning to or having it as this huge goal are happier in emigration. That’s how my husband emigrated. He just came over to study and then kind of stayed on. It was never a plan for him.
LikeLike
Having realistic expectations (or realistic lack of them) is definitely important. However, I still suspect that being better able to cope with the particular trauma of immigration has a lot to do with growing up as a member of a minority in my own country, and being used since childhood to some other language being the dominant one outside of my home. And being taught respect to both ethnic groups. “I am good and you are good.”
I am not sure if this makes me a bit of a heretic from a psychoanalysis standpoint, but in general (not only with respect to e/immigration) I am more concerned not about the trauma per se, but about one’s ability to cope with the trauma. Too much focus on the trauma tends to install some unrealistic ideas into people, that any “trauma” has to be avoided at all cost. This intolerance of trauma does not seem to be my personal invention, it is in line with this ridiculous modern intolerance to “micro-aggression” and otherwise feeling entitled to the eternal psychological comfort…
LikeLike
I agree completely that trauma of any kind can be a very transformative, ultimately positive development. However, I do not believe that a way towards that transformative potential can be found in a denial that a trauma has occurred. Before proceeding to do something ultimately useful with the trauma, it is necessary, I believe, to acknowledge it is there. Otherwise, the efforts invested into denial will take up so much energy that no transformation will be possible.
LikeLike
There is a Russian colleague at my school bu in a different department, he’s also a sweetheart. Very smart and accomplished, but nothing of the obnoxious and aggressive self-importance that plagues so many of his compatriots with a similar technical background. He’s a truly nice and kind person, and students love him.
So there may be a few unicorns around?
LikeLike
I can’t say much about the content of the videos given my mostly non-existent knowledge of Russian (with the subtitles on I get around 10-20 per cent).
What I notice (and what might be so fascinating for you) is how….. egalitarian his body language is. I’ve seen Russians trying to be pleasant before but they’re not treating the objects of their benevolence as equals, kindness comes from height in Russia, the person(s) they’re being kind to aren’t equals but objects of mercy.
This guy has none of that, he’s just a guy with some experience he thinks the viewers might benefit from. If I just saw the video with no sound (and knew it was about Canada) I might assume he’s talking about different ways of preparing Kraft Dinner and saying ‘aboot’ a lot.
LikeLike
Exactly, the fellow is just genuinely trying to be useful without offering any negativity or mockery. We usually have the top layer of fake niceness and then many more levels that are cynical, mocking, hard-edged. And he doesn’t seem to have any other layers. This is very strange.
LikeLike
I’ll also add that if I were learning Russian the videos seem to be great examples of natural spontaneous language and I’d probably spend hours listening to them.
I’m always on the lookout for stuff like that but don’t find much, some I have found useful
Italian with Leo,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6wRdVE-OJs&list=PL1wdEdguX9VFRhrC-KTiH_OHRSvyvN43l&index=7
I’ve never found that much good in Spanish, this is good but sort of thematically limited…
If you know of any good channels for Iberian (or Mexican) I’d like to know them.
Not too bad in German:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0TRj3uDl1ws
I also like this series (thematically limited to interviews with classical singers, many of whom aren’t native German speakers which is actually helpful)
LikeLike
I never considered this but it might be a great language learning tool. I definitely need to find something like this in Spanish for the students.
LikeLike
Speaking of magical Russians. I came across this story.
https://meduza.io/en/lion/2015/12/30/man-dies-from-drinking-too-much-vodka-revives-and-goes-to-drink-more-vodka
LikeLike
This will totally happen to me after I die. Just substitute vodka with potatoes. 🙂 🙂
LikeLike