Here is a female academic writing about the difficulty of raising children as a feminist:
Here I am, an academic who studies feminism, motherhood, and families. I know about the glass ceiling, the maternal wall, and the second shift. I’ve read the studies on girls and self-esteem. I banished Disney princesses from my home when my children were small (to no avail, because they somehow figured out who they were anyway). I bought all the Goldie Blox toys, and there’s a Project Mc2 sitting on a shelf.
I’m sure this is a good, well-meaning person who’s horrified with the climate change and probably donates to ecological causes. But she does not even begin to attempt to decouple the obsessive need to consume from her political beliefs. A feminist, for her, is a person who makes certain consumer choices.
“I’m a feminist, and that means I buy ABC and don’t buy XYZ” is a belief that not only trivializes and destroys feminism (and, by the way, the author confesses that she fails at raising her kids in a feminist way) but also reaffirms the dangerous consumerist philosophy.
My goal is not to single out this specific person but to suggest that we all start questioning our need to reveal our identities to the world and ourselves through the act of buying. It’s hard for everybody because the very first thing that pops into one’s mind after we experience a strong emotion is, ” What can I buy now?” But it has to be done because we are both emptying all of our experiences of any meaning and damaging the environment beyond repair.
Clarissa's Blog 
I had to laugh at this “One of my girls asked me recently why I shaved under my arms. I explained that it was an aspect of the beauty myth that I have chosen to follow. “
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Yes, the earnestness is endearing. 🙂
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Thing is, if we get rid of the consumer mentality when describing our identities, ethics and meaning in life, what do you suggest we replace it with? (I ask this because I desperately need to do it in mine for all the reasons you elucidate- not necessarily anything to do with feminism, me being a bloke…)
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Good, good question because we all desperately need this. And I only wish I knew the answer. If you are at all religious, that could help. Other than that, I’ll need to keep thinking about it.
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\ If you are at all religious, that could help. Other than that, I’ll need to keep thinking about it.
What about secular nationalism?
(I am trying to understand the conversation here and may be failing?)
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But won’t you want to buy a ton of flags, stickers and T-shirts? 🙂
Of course, there is a million and one things the professor at the link could have done to manifest her feminism without buying anything. Maybe the first step is to train oneself to see other options than buying.
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\ But won’t you want to buy a ton of flags, stickers and T-shirts?
I?!!! Never. shudder
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I’m envious.
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\ I’m envious.
Do you buy Ukrainian and American flags and so on?
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I go nuts for Ukrainian symbols. Canadian, less so but still. And the American I only put up on July 4.
Oh, also Spanish.
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I used to be religious, but a few months ago pretty much gave that part of my life up. I suppose part of it could be to value the things in life which are not material or petty “lifestyle” choices.
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I’m not sure being religous would help leaving consumerism behind.
Sometime ago I saw a comment respond to a T-shirt showing an anti-sex slogan with; “I’ve been looking for an opportunity to buy more things for Jesus.”
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I meant serious religiousness, not this kind of freak show.
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A consumerist will shop around for religions as well.
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Oh yes. Sadly, that’s the only way people (myself included) seem to be able to practice religion any longer. The birth of protestantism greatly facilitated this approach to religion.
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