Pediatricians have this annoying questionnaire they give you during the regular wellness checkups that seems designed to prey on parents’ insecurities.
Does she talk?
Does she walk?
Does she stand up unassisted?
And my favorite: does she feed herself with a spoon?
Has anybody even seen a little freak who feeds herself with a spoon at 9 months? [Of course, with my luck somebody will be reading this whose baby fed herself with a spoon at 3 months of age, and the post will make them angry. Be honest, though, do you believe it’s to be expected that such small children know how to use a spoon?]
After answering “no, no, she does not, no, she can’t do that, no” and trying to make oneself feel better with a pathetic little joke [“No, she doesn’t drink from a sippy cup. We only have one and I’m using it”], the chastened parent grabs the baby who has already disappointed the world by not having sat for the bar exam before turning 1 year old and crawls away.
My Klara just learned to clap her hands, by the way. And it feels a lot more age-appropriate than conducting conversations while standing unassisted and eating with a spoon.
Clarissa's Blog 
There is so much variability in behavioral, language, cognitive, emotional development among children – as well as adults! I know this, I know some of the science, and I still feel anxious and guilty when confronted with these lists. For a different perspective, see if you like this book: https://www.amazon.com/Gardener-Carpenter-Development-Relationship-Children/dp/0374229708 — PS: Not that it matters, but I think you and Clara are doing wonderfully.
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Thank you! I just downvoted your comment because I’m clumsy. Maybe it’s too early for me to eat with a spoon. 🙂 I meant to upvote the comment.
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🙂 You are adorable.
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The clapping stage is one of my favourites – so cute 🙂 My 15 month old just entered a kissing stage: for the last few days she has been running around kissing all the toys and then laughing. (And, yes, just huge variability during development: my two have been like chalk and cheese in that respect! )
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“My 15 month old just entered a kissing stage: for the last few days she has been running around kissing all the toys and then laughing.”
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It really is! But then, pretty much every stage is adorable, really 😀
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Definitely huge variability in development, don’t worry about it. These are really there to catch significant developmental delays.
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I know, I’m not really worried. I just find this really strange.
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One sign that they use to look for abuse or poor parenting — that the parents are forcing things on the kid — is if multiple, varied milestones are reached unusually early.
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Ah! Interesting! Thank you, this makes total sense.
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“One sign that they use to look ”
I was also thinking that the questions are a way (probably one of several) to tease out cases of neglect and/or abuse.
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Be careful how you answer those questions!
In our 10 month visit, I was given a questionnaire full of strange questions like “If you give your child a marble in a bottle, does she try to take it out?” Of course it hadn’t occurred to me to give my child a marble in a bottle, so I said “Don’t Know”. Apparently I had put down enough “Don’t Know”s that the doctor was very concerned about my daughter’s fine motor skills. This earned us an extra couple of doctor visits! In reality, she was perfectly fine.
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