Nagging Mothers

And here is more in the same vein:

Harassing your daughter about finishing up her homework may not thrill her at the time, but she’ll thank you later in life.

This comes from a study conducted by the University of Essex in England titled “Behind every successful woman is a nagging mom.” It found teenage girls are more likely to succeed if they have pushy mothers.

Yes, you can train a monkey to smoke cigarettes or put on shoes if you torture it enough but for what purpose? Why is success measured in money made (and then wasted on anti-anxiety meds, therapists, and expensive compensatory practices)? 

Unconditional maternal love and acceptance is the only wall we have between ourselves and anxiety, depression, catastrophic thinking, and low self-esteem. And we should dismantle this wall to produce a scared and miserable little robot who enhances our status with high grades and big salaries? Fuck that. 

The question these articles never ask is “succeed at what? How do I define success and why?” The answers might shock their authors.

5 thoughts on “Nagging Mothers”

  1. It found teenage girls are more likely to succeed if they have pushy mothers.
    As a kid I pretty much did my homework or I didn’t. My mother and father didn’t even really intervene because they were focused on my brother and I don’t think they knew enough to micromanage. I got minimal help with homework but nothing after the 4th grade. Once I did not turn in an English paper in middle school. My parents were called in because the teacher wanted to flunk me for the entire class. Yet they did not start monitoring whether I did homework after that.
    The weird anxious pilot light that responds to nagging kind of burnt out in me after the 8th grade. I’m not sure why.

    Anything my mother actually nags me about I haven’t done. [My father, bless him, is on another planet. He’d actually have to pay attention to nag.]


    1. After seeing these two articles one after another and seeing how many people approve of them on FB, I started understanding why catastrophic mentality and anxiety are soaring. If you treat kids as nothing but neoliberal productivity devices, that’s the result.


  2. My mother nagged me to be less successful at the things I was interested in and good at. She got what she wanted in that regard, although she still did not get the child with the interests she wanted her child to have. Yet it was all some sort of reaction: she herself had been nagged to succeed, it seems, and was in full-on rebellion. I was the person she had been nagged to be, and it was hard for her.


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