Everybody Is Cooking Rice

There’s this children’s book called “Everybody Is Cooking Rice.” At first, it’s cute. A girl visits every house on her street and sees that everybody is making a rice dish for dinner.

“The Diazes are from Mexico. They came here a year ago. They are cooking rice!

“The Bahns are from Vietnam. They came here 3 months ago. They are cooking rice!”

As the book goes on, though, it gets creepy. Everybody is from someplace else. Everybody just came here 5 minutes ago. Everybody barely speaks English.

By the end of the book, you fully expect to find a Trump campaign sticker attached to the last page asking people to donate money if they don’t want to be replaced.

5 thoughts on “Everybody Is Cooking Rice”

  1. “Everybody Is Cooking Rice”

    It’s on youtube… and I listened to it….. my first reaction was that it’s completely Soviet in spirit…. my second was that it’s the traditional American view of immigration as religious conversion, so you have people who’ve converted at various times and are at various places in the process, but they all believe in the one true god which is why there’s no real diversity, just a pleasant spectrum of skin colors and pleasingly cosmopolitan names and interesting foods… weird, weird, weird.


  2. “Everybody is cooking rice.”

    Actually, everybody isn’t, lady. But you just gave me a great idea, thanks!

    Since I retired from the military 22 years ago and started cooking my own food, I’ve followed a basic diet that’s kept me healthy into old age: Red meat on the George Foreman 5-7 times a week (occasional baked chicken in the oven), plus some form of potato starch (whole raw potatoes or overpriced Omaha Steaks French fries baked in the oven, or frozen Safeway mashed potatoes warmed in the microwave, etc.), followed by a mixture of canned and frozen vegetables heated in the microwave with various spicy salts added, ending with dessert of various cold distorted pickled vegetables in the refrigerator, and a Dr.Pepper or Diet Coke to wash it all down.

    I’d forgotten how easy it is to prepare rice, and what a tasty starch substitute frozen rice is when you slop some butter and water on it before you nuke it int he microwave.

    So, Clarissa, thanks to your brilliant hint, I’m going to going to start alternating my daily starch intake between potatoes and rice. Thanks to your dietary suggestion, I’ll save a lot of meal prep time and probably live at least to 100. THANKS!


    1. The problem here is not the immigrants. Who are not real anyway. Recent immigrants with little English prefer to live in areas with people from the same region. In real life, the Diazes and the Bahns would never meet.

      The problem is with the attitude that promotes the idea of people as interchangeable widgets.


      1. “the attitude that promotes the idea of people as interchangeable widgets”

        But each with a yummy rice recipe! Except of course for the Vietnamese, I laughed out loud at the description of the fish sauce as “… interesting”

        It was apparently published in 1991 and seems like a forerunner of a lot of American TV shows now where the differences in racial and/or ethnic and/or religious backgrounds are reflected ….. not at all, they’re all interchangeable widgets completely unformed by their background.


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