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A Very Important Test

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Clarissa

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My kid’s grade is undergoing some “very important comprehensive testing” this week. Or maybe next week, I’m not sure. No testing is remotely important to third graders. It’s the teacher who is being evaluated. She’s written several emails to the parents exhorting us to tell the kids not to worry. Of course, the best way to make a kid worry is to persecute her with pleas not to.

Imagine a friend coming up to you and opening with, “please, don’t worry, everything is fine. There’s really no reason to worry at all.” Immediately you’d know that something bad occurred and you need to start worrying.

I wish teachers learned not to outsource their drama to kids and parents.

5 responses to “A Very Important Test”

  1. methylethyl Avatar
    methylethyl

    We administered those tests at home this term.

    I told the kids, this was just to make sure they were familiar with the format so when they encounter it later, it won’t be a new thing. It’ll probably be stupid easy, we’ll zip right through it and then move on to things that matter, because standardized test scores don’t actually mean anything. It just lets us check the administrative checkbox.

    And… it was stupid easy, we zipped through it, and that was that.

    Liked by 2 people

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    1. Clarissa Avatar
      Clarissa

      Getting into the habit of doing tests is good for the future, definitely. Stay alone with your knowledge should be enjoyable, in my opinion. All stress in these things is manufactured entirely by adults.

      Liked by 1 person

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      1. methylethyl Avatar
        methylethyl

        My end-of-year bonus and job security don’t depend on how my kids perform 😉

        Liked by 2 people

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        1. Clarissa Avatar
          Clarissa

          Many parents act like it does. Like children are little achievement machines. It’s very sad.

          Liked by 2 people

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  2. Stringer Bell Avatar
    Stringer Bell

    Or my favorite, telling someone who is angry to calm down when everybody knows it always achieves the opposite effect.

    Liked by 1 person

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A conservative literary critic and college professor

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