N and I didn’t have a wedding. We got married in difficult circumstances and simply went to the courthouse one day after I finished teaching.
We didn’t have a wedding but we most certainly have a marriage. It’s the most intense, vibrant and exciting marriage I have ever seen or read about. On June 6, we’ll be celebrating 18 years together.
We had no wedding experience but we do have a marriage. I’m sure a wedding experience is amazing. I’m happy for people who got to have it. I’m not criticizing those who had a wedding experience, God forbid. My life turned out differently and I never had it. But that didn’t preclude me from having a marriage.
It’s the same with college. You don’t need a college experience as portrayed on TV to have a college degree. The college experience – living on campus, attending all the events, hanging out with friends after classes – is great. But it’s not necessary or obligatory. You can get a degree without the experience.
The experience is definitely expensive. People get into the mentality that it’s worth saddling yourself with enormous debt very early in life, and that’s a mistake. We need more acceptance of limiting factors. If you can’t afford it, don’t buy it. You can still have your college education even if you start later in life and don’t do the dorm / activities / lounging around doing nothing for 4 years. I started my BA at almost 23, never lived in a dorm, worked several part-time crappy jobs at any given time, belonged to no student clubs and attended no activities because I had to work. And ended up having more degrees than any regular person can possibly wish for. All we need is to learn to accept reality and exist within its constraints.
I know a young mother of two who isn’t getting married because there’s no money for a wedding of her dreams. To me, it’s absolutely nutso-crazy-boom-boom. Thankfully, nobody is offering wedding loans en masse, so at least she isn’t getting into debt to finance the experience.
By the way, experience economy is a neoliberal invention, and I can talk about it later to prevent this post from getting even longer.
Clarissa's Blog 
OT: Habemvs Papam. Previous and Papal name not yet revealed….
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Is it Parolin like everybody said? I’m confused.
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No, it’s Prevost! Does anybody know anything about him?
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“Prevost! Does anybody know anything about him?”
according to wikipedia….. Has been a Peruvian citizen since 2015 (not sure about his US status).
And…. not tough on sex abuse….. (sigh).
We’ll see how this plays out.
His Italian has a distinct American accent which should be amusing….
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The whole part where he was born in Chicago and set off on a mission to Peru in the 80s kinda hints he’s one of the liberation guys who’ve spent decades leaving the doors of the church open so that Pentecostals and JWs can poach their parishioners.
Not optimistic. But I guess we’ll see.
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Francis 2.0. Let’s hope he has some revelation from above and becomes a good pope.
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OT: funny tweet
https://x.com/rominabadoino/status/1920529670811861463
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Peruvian is more likely to be not insanely left-wing than Argentinean, so here’s to hoping.
Great joke. I’ll share with my Peruvian brother-in-law.
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Prevost is a dual citizen of the US and Peru, is bilingual in English and Spanish (through his mother’s side), has a perfect command of Italian and is fluent in French and Portuguese. He’s considered a centrist. Was a bishop in Peru for a whole decade and, the most interesting fact, he comes from a religious order, the Augustinians (very learned, very pious). Apparently, prior to his election as pope, he occupied one of the most prominent positions in the Roman Curia, Prefect for the Dicastery of Bishops, to which he was appointed by his predecessor less than two years ago.
I don’t know what all this may portend. I am just thankful to the Holy Spirit on account of neither Cardinal Zuppi, nor Cardinal Parolin being elected. The former would have been a catastrophe, the latter a disaster, in term of the possibly nefarious influence they might have exerted outside the Vatican and the Roman Church.
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I’m sorry to say that, but he is no centrist. He is as liberal leftist as they get. Blase Cupich’s man. I’m not so sure he is a better choice than Cardinals Zuppi or Parolin, who, I agree would be disastrous. There are a lot of outspoken traditionalists in the US. I have a feeling he was put in place to deal with the American problem, among other things.
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Oh, that’s not good. Why, why do the lefty ones keep getting selected Is it supposed to attract the young generation? Because that doesn’t work.
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Can anybody give details of the new Pope’s left-wing bent?
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Conservative on social issues (same sex marriage, gender insanity) but open borders supporter.
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Why, why are they all like this? What’s the point of a church if it’s not deeply conservative?
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From one of my favorite TV shows, Yes Prime Minister. The PM Jim Hacker must recommend the appointment of bishops to the Queen but is not keen on the two offered by the Church.
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Because the gay ones get preferentially promoted?
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Also, there was a concerted media campaign to paint him as an acceptable candidate in the days before the conclave. It worked.
https://catholicvote.org/legacy-catholic-media-promote-cardinal-same-time-coincidence-or-campaign/
I sincerely hope that I am wrong about him and that he will be great. Sometimes people when they are placed into the office end up rising to the occasion.
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That’s cool an American is the pope, let’s see how this turns out. To go back on topic, one doesn’t need a lot of money or frills for a wedding, scores of people get married in Las Vegas at a chapel or at the courthouse and are doing fine. Whenever I hear about a big, garish wedding I just shake my head since it’s a waste of money, you just need the document. My parents had a courthouse marriage and my neighbors recently had theirs at the courthouse, there’s nothing wrong or trashy with a courthouse wedding instead of spending a fortune on a flashy wedding
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We would have preferred a courthouse wedding, but married in church to satisfy religious requirements, small reception to satisfy family. Sewed my own dress, borrowed the flowers (knew a guy who grew orchids, they were potted and we gave them back after), told my sponsor and maid of honor to just wear what they liked (and they ended up wearing perfectly matched beige silk dresses without ever speaking to each other or planning that: how??) family cooked the food, and all told we came in just under $1k including renting a wheelchair-accessible hall, tipping the choir fund, dress fabric, napkins and plates and everything.
Still would’ve preferred to *not* do all the fuss and bother, but I think we did pretty well for not being able to get out of it.
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That’s a great story.
The hard part is to find the person to marry. The trappings and the ceremony, while fun, are not the point. Thinking that they are doesn’t bode well for the actual marriage.
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Fun for *some*. Kind of a chore for people like us.
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You might like the movie “Good Will Hunting” where a young janitor using the library is solving problems the students at MIT his age are unable to.
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Maybe the janitor also knew what a non sequitur is.
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Sorry, but this is definitely not a good day for Christendom(aka the West), so maybe, just maybe he understands a set up when he sees one ;-D
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Is it really that bad? I want to find something positive in this.
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Do you really think that Rome somehow did not notice the Catholic NGO’s organizing and funding the movement of illegal aliens?
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