Oh, poor innocent child. It doesn’t work like that at all. Not the teensy wee bit.
The suggestions are all good. I recommend following them. But desire can’t be subjected to an algorithm. Good girls get dumped for bad girls all the time.
The Algorithm of Desire
Clarissa's Blog 
Good girls get dumped for bad girls all the time.
What I find difficult to fathom, when I consider neoliberals and neoliberal thought, is their total contempt for, and utter disregard of, reality. Why? Even when it stares them right in the face they refuse to acknowledge it. Why?
I blame Romanticism.
LikeLike
It’s the godlike self that believes reality should bend to the force of her will.
And it absolutely began in the era of the Romantics when human emotion suddenly became all-important.
Nothing wrong with emotions, of course, but this cheap, gurgly emotionality that suddenly started to gush from everywhere ate up our public space.
LikeLike
Well, if both spouses had that behavior, there would be a lot happier marriages. Hell, half of my recipes developed while learning to cook one of my wife’s favourite foods. Maybe substitute her cleaning instinct for my drive to repair her nest ;-D
LikeLike
This is very much tradwife content. This whole respect him no matter what (even though he maybe be an abusive douchebag or otherwise unworthy of respect), be his peace (even though he might be creating endless chaos in your and your kids’ lives), clean (apparently even his place while he’s your boyfriend? Why?!), cook (Why must a woman always cook? Why can’t he cook sometime?). Paradoxically for the woman, the more you prostrate yourself before a dude like this, the more likely he is to take you for granted
LikeLike
Trying too hard marks one as an undesirable partner because if you come off as desperate, it means something is wrong with you that you are trying to mask by being so accommodating.
LikeLiked by 1 person
“Good girls get dumped for bad girls all the time”
Just like good guys get dumped for bad boys all the time.
Both sexes, in their raw unfiltered state, have terrible, terrible awful taste in partners. That’s why everything in society used to be set up to steer them towards more appropriate pairings.
Now I’ll misuse Freud, neoliberalism crowns the id to make life’s important decisions (ie ‘choices’) and the results are about what you’d expect….
LikeLike
People treat their love life like I did that combined washer. “I need to figure out the right sequence of buttons, and it will bring the desired result!” It did work with the washer but people are more complicated.
LikeLiked by 1 person
LOL, Kid, don;t overthink it. Love exists, without a large degree of bonding, it is hard to imagine how we would even exist as a species. Sure, we have spent the last three generations with nasty ideologues deliberately undermining it, but it simply will not go away. Hell, even notable abusive relationships like Sartre and de Beauvoir considered themselves as a “soul partnership” ;-D
LikeLike