What this woman narrates about “mental load” is the perfect counterpoint to my toilet paper holders. She should be so happy that there are all these different types of milk and stuff. It’s such a wonderful thing to live in abundance and be able to choose all these great products for your family. She complains that thinking about milk occupies her thoughts too much but what would she be thinking about instead?
There is an incredible number of sources of joy in regular daily life. Doing things for your family, replenishing the supplies of beans or coffee, it’s so great because it means you have a family. You have people who need you. Instead of bitching and moaning and feeling sorry for herself, she could be in paroxysms of happiness. Everybody is alive, healthy, and eager to drink their milk.
These attitudes should not be encouraged. There should be a social taboo against whining about grocery lists. It’s undignified and unnecessary.
Clarissa's Blog 
“What this woman narrates about “mental load””
Her mental load has nothing to do with milk and everything to do with being an irreplaceable special snowflake and/or being deeply resentful that others are not deranged control freaks like she is.
What does it matter if he gets the ‘wrong’ milk? Variety and a change of routine is fine. And who checks expiration dates in the supermarket?
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She’s a walking guilt generator. Imagine having that around all the time.
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Yikes, can you imagine some poor daft bugger trying to make love to her ;-D
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I hope he’s completely deaf.
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“Imagine having that around all the time”
I’d rather live in a house with free range rattlesnakes.
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Word.
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LOL ;-D
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She needs a Holiday in Cambodia.
Walnut
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For the sake of her family, I hope it’s a really long holiday. 😂😂😂
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Seems to me it makes sense to have one family member who keeps track of one subset of things (all the stuff in fridge and freezer in this example) and another who keeps track of other things. Division of labor is very efficient.
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Haha. I kind of get it, on the one hand. I’m terribly disorganized. Sometimes I do end up in a hole with housekeeping where… I’m overwhelmed, because I’m trying to cook, and keep up with dishes, laundry and cleaning for five people. Who are not only not helping, but adding unnecessarily to the workload by, say, putting completely clean clothes back into the dirty-laundry flow because putting it in the dresser was too onerous, or getting a fresh drinking glass every time they get a drink, eight times a day, spilling things on the floor and then just… leaving it for someone else to clean up.
The temptation to be resentful about this is huge.
But at the same time… these are my kids. MY kids. Whose job is it to civilize them? Oh, right, that’s MY job. We are in this situation because I have not been keeping on top of that. OK, time to get the army back into shape… it is my job to make sure that when they reach adulthood, they can do all this stuff for themselves, and they are not unmarriageable slobs. I want grandkids, AND I don’t want to be the one raising them. Nobody said the job was easy. Just necessary.
-ethyl
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methylethyl
LOL, I don’t really think any of us were arguing about the need for family team work. Personally, I had four younger siblings where Dad was often working out of town, and Mom often worked part time. As we got older we all pitched in, but the house was seldom perfect — maybe for holidays with family gatherings, but even then there would be fortyeleven kids creating widespread shambles ;-D
That neurotic woman came across as a complete control freak, unhappily babbling feminist mythic equality nonsense, and how so few males understood her marvelous understanding of how everything should be. Sorry, strong pass. Meanwhile…
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I will take your word for it. Incompatible with video formats and all.
Most discussions of the “mental load” problem come down to:
-woman feels overwhelmed, man possibly wants to be helpful, but
-woman doesn’t want to be his manager OR she has tried it, and he reacted to it badly. He needs intensive instruction and reminders to actually be helpful, but either she doesn’t know how to do that in a way he can accept, or he flat cannot take any kind of direction from an intimate partner or females generally. Unclear whether this is a problem of fragile ego, mommy issues, or just some testosterone thing, but it is imo very common.
-It’s not insurmountable, but does require delicate handling.
-ethyl
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methylethyl
Hmmm, well, somebody has to lead, so given the options you proffered, I choose “just some testerone thing” ;-D
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