Loving Couples

I’ve recently had a chance to observe a newlywed couple. They are so much in love that one feels happy just to be around them. The sun starts shining out of their ears whenever they talk about each other. Their eyes glaze over when they look at each other. It’s just lovely to behold.

The curse of being an older person, though, is that one has seen many passionately loving couples who, over the years, turned into bickering, miserable people whose favorite form of entertainment is barking at each other.

“So how is Jay?” you ask the formerly star-crossed lover who used to bore everybody stiff with the endless stories about their partner’s perfections.

“Oh, don’t ask me about that loser. I come home and there is a pile of dirty laundry. Like I’m some sort of slave, or something. Ooh, there are so many hot young bods in this bar. I like-y.”

And that makes me really sad. I’m not sad for them, though. Their lives are their business and their choice. As a happy participant in a love-struck, sunshine-coming-out-of-my-ears couple, I don’t want to experience this sad denouement to my relationship, that’s all.

I don’t have any interesting insights to offer here. I’m just sharing my worries. As a blogger, I will have to report it when if my relationship gets to the sad stage of “bleh, enough about that boring person.”

7 thoughts on “Loving Couples

  1. Love is a temporary madness.
    It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides.
    And when it subsides you have to make a decision.
    You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion.
    That is just being “in love” which any of us can convince ourselves we are.
    Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.

    – Captain Corelli’s Mandolin

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  2. Yes, that’s exactly where I’m terrified of ending up! Life without passion and without the kind of feeling where your heart stops whenever you see the person you love isn’t worth it for me. I see it as sad, hopeless drudgery.

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  3. @Clarissa

    I think you missed the point of that quote. Love isnt the infatuation part, it is what comes after the buzz wear’s off. That is one reason why you have serial relationship people. They confuse the hormonal high with love.

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    1. I don’t dispute your right to your definition. But I have the right to mine, don’t I? For me, “when the buzz wears off” staying with the person is prison. I could never understand why anybody would do that. Love doesn’t exist without psssion for me.

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  4. My parents have been married for over thirty years. At their thirtieth anniversary a couple years ago, my dad gave a toast to my mom that brought everyone to tears. He said that although he gets to know her better and better with each passing year, she is still like a force of nature to him–a hurricane or tsunami whose inner workings are mysterious and unpredictable.

    Until then I’d been kind of skeptical about marriage, or at least long-term relationships in general. Don’t get me wrong, I can’t wait for that to happen to me, but I always worried that it would wear off eventually. But after hearing my dad’s toast, I realized that it’s entirely possible to spend thirty years together and still be completely mesmerized by the person you’ve married. 🙂

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  5. @Clarissa

    Of course you have that right, that’s one of the joys of choice. For me the quote makes sense because in the early stages of so called love most of us are totally engrossed by it. As we mature in our relationships it generally changes in texture. If not we would never get anything done. 😉
    You can still have passion but without being overwhelmed by it. Ask a 17yr old that and they would think you are nuts. 🙂

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